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dallasdivergirl
12-29-2008, 15:15
Math for the Fast Lane


This is why math is taught in school.
I was riding to work yesterday when I observed a female driver cut right in front of a pickup truck, causing him to have to drive onto the shoulder to avoid hitting her.
This evidently angered the driver enough that he hung his arm out his window and "flipped" the woman off.
"Man, that guy is stupid," I thought to myself. I ALWAYS smile nicely and wave in a sheepish manner whenever a female does anything to me in traffic, and here's why..........
I drive 48 miles each way every day to work. That's 96 miles each day. Of these, 16 miles each way is bumper-to-bumper. Most of the bumper-to-bumper is on an 8 lane highway. There are 7 cars every 40 feet for 32 miles. That works out to be 982 cars every mile, or 31,424 cars.
Even though the rest of the 32 miles is not bumper to bumper, figure I pass at least another 4000 cars. That brings the number to something like 36,000 cars that I pass everyday.
Statistically, half of these are driven by females.
That's 18,000 women drivers! In any given group of females, 1 in 28 has PMS. That's 642. According to Cosmopolitan, 70% describe their love life as dissatisfying or unrewarding. That's 449.
According to the National Institute of Health, 22% of all females have seriously considered suicide or homicide. That's 98.
And 34% describe men as their biggest problem. That's 33.
According to the National Rifle Association, 5% of all females carry weapons, and this number is increasing.
That means that EVERY SINGLE DAY, I drive past at least one female that has a lousy love life, thinks men are her biggest problem, has seriously considered suicide or homicide, has PMS, and is armed.
Flip one off? ... I think not.

WV Diver
12-29-2008, 15:20
ROFL, that is good Dallas.:smilie39:

So we men have 1 chance in 18,000 that we will have a very bad day if we flip off a female driver. I don't like the odds.

ektess1
12-29-2008, 20:22
Loved it. Too funny.
I am wondering what the reaction of the fairer sex will be and if she is armed.

Suther2136
12-29-2008, 20:52
Math for the Fast Lane


This is why math is taught in school.
I was riding to work yesterday when I observed a female driver cut right in front of a pickup truck, causing him to have to drive onto the shoulder to avoid hitting her.
This evidently angered the driver enough that he hung his arm out his window and "flipped" the woman off.
"Man, that guy is stupid," I thought to myself. I ALWAYS smile nicely and wave in a sheepish manner whenever a female does anything to me in traffic, and here's why..........
I drive 48 miles each way every day to work. That's 96 miles each day. Of these, 16 miles each way is bumper-to-bumper. Most of the bumper-to-bumper is on an 8 lane highway. There are 7 cars every 40 feet for 32 miles. That works out to be 982 cars every mile, or 31,424 cars.
Even though the rest of the 32 miles is not bumper to bumper, figure I pass at least another 4000 cars. That brings the number to something like 36,000 cars that I pass everyday.
Statistically, half of these are driven by females.
That's 18,000 women drivers! In any given group of females, 1 in 28 has PMS. That's 642. According to Cosmopolitan, 70% describe their love life as dissatisfying or unrewarding. That's 449.
According to the National Institute of Health, 22% of all females have seriously considered suicide or homicide. That's 98.
And 34% describe men as their biggest problem. That's 33.
According to the National Rifle Association, 5% of all females carry weapons, and this number is increasing.
That means that EVERY SINGLE DAY, I drive past at least one female that has a lousy love life, thinks men are her biggest problem, has seriously considered suicide or homicide, has PMS, and is armed.
Flip one off? ... I think not.



Oh come on, 33 out of 36000 is less than 0.1% flip away the odds are on your side, and the odds reset every day.

awb
12-29-2008, 21:44
It sounds like to me you are ready to start the DM program and get with the physics!!!!!!!

Skuttle
12-29-2008, 22:29
:smilie39: That is just way to much for me to think about...

dallasdivergirl
12-30-2008, 05:47
It sounds like to me you are ready to start the DM program and get with the physics!!!!!!!

I do need to crack those books. two work tests with math coming up first. Pest control license (does being on here count towards that?!?) and irritation license. I did make a deal to stay out of the water for a few months after the pneumonia. I should have some time on my hands.

Suther2136
01-02-2009, 16:20
It sounds like to me you are ready to start the DM program and get with the physics!!!!!!!

I do need to crack those books. two work tests with math coming up first. Pest control license (does being on here count towards that?!?) and irritation license. I did make a deal to stay out of the water for a few months after the pneumonia. I should have some time on my hands.

Wait, you mean you actually get a license for being irritating?

dallasdivergirl
01-04-2009, 17:31
It sounds like to me you are ready to start the DM program and get with the physics!!!!!!!

I do need to crack those books. two work tests with math coming up first. Pest control license (does being on here count towards that?!?) and irritation license. I did make a deal to stay out of the water for a few months after the pneumonia. I should have some time on my hands.

Wait, you mean you actually get a license for being irritating?

That is supposed to be irrigation. and you do need a license for that. I have proven repeatedly that you don't need qualifications for irritation.

Navy OnStar
01-04-2009, 19:28
I am stationed in rural Florida and only see fellow military and rednecks on the way to work. I'm pretty senior on the base so I'm not worried about the military. However, I am sure 100% of the rednecks are armed......I still flip away!

emt
02-04-2009, 14:11
"Even though the rest of the 32 miles is not bumper to bumper, figure I pass at least another 4000 cars. That brings the number to something like 36,000 cars that I pass everyday."

If they were in your lane when you passed them, I think we'll try to sign you up for the Daytona 500 coming up on Feb. 15. :finish: