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julz
05-19-2009, 11:11
Hormone Guide
Women will understand this! men you best memorize it!

Every woman knows that there are days in the month when all a man has to do is open his mouth and he takes his life in his hands!
This is a handy guide that should be as common as a driver's license in the wallet of every husband, boyfriend, co-worker or significant other!

DANGEROUS: SAFER: SAFEST: ULTRA SAFE:
What's for dinner? Can I help you Where would you Here, have some wine.
with dinner? like to go to dinner?

Are you wearing that? Wow, you sure look WOW! Look at you! Here, have some wine
good in brown?

What are you so Could we be Here's my paycheck. Here, have some wine.
worked up about? overreacting?

Should you be You know, there are Can I get you a piece Here, have some wine.
eating that? a lot of apples left. of chocolate with that?

What did you DO I hope you didn't I've always loved you Here, have some wine
all day? over-do it today. in that robe!


~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~* ~*~*~*~*~*~*
13 Things PMS Stands For:
1. Pass My Shotgun
2. Psychotic Mood Shift
3. Perpetual Munching Spree
4. Puffy Mid-Section
5. People Make me Sick
6. Provide Me with Sweets
7. Pardon My Sobbing
8. Pimples May Surface
9. Pass My Sweatpants
10. Pissy Mood Syndrome
11. Plainly; Men Suck
12. Pack My Stuff
and my favorite one.
13. Potential Murder Suspect http://www.pugs.com/modules/Forums/images/smiles/lol2.gif http://www.pugs.com/modules/Forums/images/smiles/lol2.gif

obrules15
05-19-2009, 14:38
too funny



Hormone Guide
Women will understand this! men you best memorize it!

Every woman knows that there are days in the month when all a man has to do is open his mouth and he takes his life in his hands!
This is a handy guide that should be as common as a driver's license in the wallet of every husband, boyfriend, co-worker or significant other!

DANGEROUS: SAFER: SAFEST: ULTRA SAFE:
What's for dinner? Can I help you with dinner? Where would you like to go to dinner? Here, have some wine.

Are you wearing that? Wow, you sure look good in brown! WOW! Look at you! Here, have some wine !

What are you so worked up about? Could we be overreacting? Here's my paycheck. Here, have some wine.

Should you be eating that? You know, there are a lot of apples left. Can I get you a piece chocolate with that? Here, have some wine.

What did you DO all day? I hope you didn't over-do it today. I've always loved you in that robe! Here, have some wine



~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~* ~*~*~*~*~*~*
13 Things PMS Stands For:
1. Pass My Shotgun
2. Psychotic Mood Shift
3. Perpetual Munching Spree
4. Puffy Mid-Section
5. People Make me Sick
6. Provide Me with Sweets
7. Pardon My Sobbing
8. Pimples May Surface
9. Pass My Sweatpants
10. Pissy Mood Syndrome
11. Plainly; Men Suck
12. Pack My Stuff
and my favorite one.
13. Potential Murder Suspect

snagel
05-19-2009, 17:53
You're right, I don't understand. Please elaborate......Aunt Flo will be here any day. I've been married for 20 years and I just don't get it.

Snagel

Coastie6
05-19-2009, 18:00
Great stuff. Yes, I've always found wine helps!

cruzan
05-20-2009, 18:15
Great stuff. Yes, I've always found wine helps!

Yeah but which one of you drinks it...:smiley36:

scubagirlj
05-20-2009, 18:30
you forgot one-PMS= Putting up with Mens ****

navyhmc
05-20-2009, 18:35
I always thought the best answer was: "Here have some chocolate!"

chilly willy
05-20-2009, 20:05
Another addition......
Permissible Man Slaughter

IrishSquid
05-20-2009, 20:18
One more: Potentially, Men Suffering :smilie40:

teddyg
05-25-2009, 22:21
I don't have PMS; there are just certain days when everyone's a jerk..........

scubastud
05-26-2009, 05:34
I don't have PMS; there are just certain days when everyone's a jerk..........

Love it! Oh, and love your signture "paddle faster" heh

BubblesMcCoy
05-26-2009, 08:07
I always thought the best answer was: "Here have some chocolate!"

I've always preferred, "can I get you something on my way home from the dive trip?"

reefgirl64
06-03-2009, 17:01
LOL!!! Love the signature too, teddyg! :)
I think I need to print this thread of & post it on my fridge.

caburrid
07-08-2009, 20:13
LOL!!! Love the signature too, teddyg! :)
I think I need to print this thread of & post it on my fridge.

Lol, too funny! I have been reading these posts on this forum for a while and its great to finally be able to post some of these from my fridge!

Recon
07-08-2009, 22:11
I just leave my wife ALONE! I tend to keep myself locked in my office "busy" with something work related for the full duration of the "event" in question. And if our paths must cross I tend to choose my words very very very carefully as at any given minute Linda Blair may surface and then the earth will collapse around me as I fall to the ground in terror....

~Recon

BuzzF117
07-09-2009, 12:28
deleted post

scubajane
01-09-2010, 20:37
how many women having PMS does it take to change a light bulb?????


























WHO CARES!!!!

navyhmc
01-09-2010, 22:14
how many women having PMS does it take to change a light bulb?????

WHO CARES!!!!


I thought it was either:

"ONE DAMMIT!!!!"

or

"WHEN ARE YOU CHANGING THAT DAMMNED LIGHTBULB?!"

PACKRMAN
01-10-2010, 08:24
how many women having PMS does it take to change a light bulb?????

WHO CARES!!!!


I thought it was either:

"ONE DAMMIT!!!!"

or

"WHEN ARE YOU CHANGING THAT DAMMNED LIGHTBULB?!"

http://forum.scubatoys.com/gallery/files/6/5/5/0/insanity_wood.jpg

I SAID NOW!!!
MISTER...

scubajane
01-10-2010, 12:41
Ahhhhhh the voice of experience :)

TwistedSister209
01-11-2010, 20:47
Wine and chocolate solve a lot of life's ills. If that doesn't work, I try Scotch.