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Vercingetorix
08-26-2007, 08:57
...so any of you vets got anymore great tips on these issue's?

Not stated elsewhere, this needs stating (for kids like Krakenn).

The Number One Man Law:

It's your fault. It's ALWAYS your fault. Even if you think it was her fault, it was your fault for putting her in the position such that she might be at fault (which, of course, she isn't).

Capt Hook
08-26-2007, 09:01
Restated: Even when you're right, you're wrong!

scuba Widow
08-26-2007, 10:55
You guys finally got something right in the Man Laws

deepdiver47
08-26-2007, 11:11
Being married for almost 20 years I think that I can comment on this.

First, marry your best friend. Marriage isn't about money or sex as you can lose both when you get older. Then what do you have?

Secondly, compromise, you heard me. If you go diving on one day then spend the next day with what she wants to do. Don't be naive guys, you know what she likes.

Third, agree to disagree. no one is going to be right 100% of the time (no one!). If you are wrong make sure that you fall on your sword and sincerely apologize.

Above all, show her that you appreciate what she does for you and the kids. Buy her flowers once and awhile as it is the little things that really matter.

I am mushy because I am planning our 20th at the moment.

Vercingetorix
08-26-2007, 11:12
You guys finally got something right in the Man LawsIt's called experience, ma'am.:smiley36:

Jaymeany
08-26-2007, 11:24
Being married for almost 20 years I think that I can comment on this.

First, marry your best friend. Marriage isn't about money or sex as you can lose both when you get older. Then what do you have?


Don't you lose both when you get married? :smiley36:

Secondly, compromise, you heard me. If you go diving on one day then spend the next day with what she wants to do. Don't be naive guys, you know what she likes.

Everything is in a 1:2 ration. One you get one thing she gets two. Just like if you go away for a week you get twice the grief you get to give if she goes away.

Third, agree to disagree. no one is going to be right 100% of the time (no one!). If you are wrong make sure that you fall on your sword and sincerely apologize.

I agree with the post before this one. Just assume you are wrong. :smiley2:

Above all, show her that you appreciate what she does for you and the kids. Buy her flowers once and awhile. It is the little things that matter.

100% agree!!!!!!!!

I am mushy because I am planning our 20th at the moment.

I jest, I love my wife but she runs the show!

ScubaToys Larry
08-26-2007, 12:17
If a man says something in the woods and no one hears him... Is he still wrong?

deepdiver47
08-26-2007, 13:04
no one owns anyone JM, she does because you think she does. You know, you can because you think you can? :)

scubasavvy
08-26-2007, 13:40
If a man says something in the woods and no one hears him... Is he still wrong?

:smilie39:...probably...:smilie39:

and to answer the initial question: in the words of Chris Rock, "Say "yes" to anything you can afford..."

Charlotte Smith
08-26-2007, 13:47
can't we all just get along?

Vercingetorix
08-26-2007, 14:33
can't we all just get along?I'm trying to understand the context of your post.

I infer that you think we're attacking each other here. I don't believe that's the case. When I started this thread, it is as a guy making humor about other guys. If I've misinterpreted your remarks, I apologize; please clarify.

Suther2136
08-26-2007, 15:10
Being married for almost 20 years I think that I can comment on this.

First, marry your best friend. Marriage isn't about money or sex as you can lose both when you get older. Then what do you have?

Secondly, compromise, you heard me. If you go diving on one day then spend the next day with what she wants to do. Don't be naive guys, you know what she likes.

Third, agree to disagree. no one is going to be right 100% of the time (no one!). If you are wrong make sure that you fall on your sword and sincerely apologize.

Above all, show her that you appreciate what she does for you and the kids. Buy her flowers once and awhile as it is the little things that really matter.

I am mushy because I am planning our 20th at the moment.

Buy her the flowers for no reason! Apologize when needed but buy the flowers another day when you just want to brighten her world. I'm going on 25 years later this year, trust me on this. Also, plan a weekend away once in a while, but cover all the issues first. I took my wife for a weekend at a B&B, covered the kids, covered the house, covered all her questions in advance, she went home and packed for the getaway. Plan deep my firend.

greyzen
08-26-2007, 15:47
Buying flowers for no reason is a GREAT way to show you care.

I've found booking overnight hotel stays in random cities around my area (or in my area) also works as it just gives her a little change of pace.

Note: in Dallas, I35 and Fitzhugh there is a motel right at the corner...
I want to say it is a Best Western or Super 8.

Anyhow, they have jacuzzi tub bedrooms that are decently priced... and a lot of fun. :)

You can chill in the jacuzzi and watch movies, drink champagne/etc. for little to no reason. I would also suggest some sandelwood or lavander bathsoap and a nice shoulder massage :)
My wife loves it :D

Jaymeany
08-26-2007, 16:23
I take random flowers to the next level! I apologize randomly just in case she is mad and i haven't seen "the signs" yet. hehe :smiley36:

I take her to Yankees games (in NYC or Boston) or a wine tour and we stay at a castle near here (doesn't really look like a castle but whatever)

mm_dm
08-26-2007, 16:24
I am mushy because I am planning our 20th at the moment.


20 years...all to one woman?

Oustanding!

deepdiver47
08-26-2007, 19:15
can't we all just get along?I'm trying to understand the context of your post.

I infer that you think we're attacking each other here. I don't believe that's the case. When I started this thread, it is as a guy making humor about other guys. If I've misinterpreted your remarks, I apologize; please clarify.


me to, I have no ill feelings to anyone. We can all agree to disagree and you will still make it a friendly debate.

Vercingetorix
08-26-2007, 20:21
We can all agree to disagree and you will still make it a friendly debate.I didn't even see this as a debate. Rather, how do we (men) dig outselves out of a hole? Something humorous.

Jaymeany
08-26-2007, 20:29
I'm confused.

scubafreak
08-26-2007, 20:37
I have the last say in my house......

"Yes Dear"

kevinj1
08-26-2007, 21:01
If a man says something in the woods and no one hears him... Is he still wrong?

It depends; Are you asking a woman this question?

Phestr
08-26-2007, 21:38
I have the last say in my house......

"Yes Dear"


Amen, brother! But seriously, it is all about compromise. For example, I am int the 3rd season of Grays Anatomy. I hate medical shows. I hate soap operas. Yes, the girls are hot, but not that hot. I watch because my wife watches. Little things like that make it.

scuba Widow
08-26-2007, 21:40
we have made it easier...dvr

Jaymeany
08-26-2007, 21:43
2 tv's
Grey's upstairs for her
CSI downstairs for me.

Guess who gets the brand new nice TV :smiley19:

DUnder
08-28-2007, 14:00
I am celebrating my 25th today:smiley20: I have found out that she wants to be treated with respect wants me to be open and honest with her. Also like other people have said Flowers are always nice, do some household chores with out being asked, if you can cook, make her a nice dinner with candle light and no kids.

ertechsg
08-28-2007, 15:36
we are human theres now way to get along always. we all need some time to ourselves. I always help cook ,clean I do live there too. We have been together for 17 yr there I tell her I still love her everyday and how hot she still looks. this is marriage 60/60 having to give more than 1/2 to make it

Kingpatzer
08-28-2007, 16:05
Coming up on 20 years next June.

Recognize that it takes hard work and sacrifice.

Indeed, if you don't feel like you are sacrificing regularly for her, you aren't working hard enough at the relationship.

It's worth it in the end, but you have to take the risk of putting her first to really find that out.

foo
08-28-2007, 21:57
It's worth it in the end, but you have to take the risk of putting her first to really find that out.

I love this! I've been married 28 years (yes, to the same man.) There's a verse in the bible that says to "prefer one another", and that is really it in a nutshell. My husband does little things that show he "prefers" me, and I do the same for him. It could be as simple as folding the clothes for her, even if it's her turn. When I make my husband's lunch, I like to put notes or peel his orange for him.

Speaking of small things, my other advice is "don't sweat the small stuff." We women tend to have trouble with this one, but I've learned- pick your fights carefully, make sure it's really important before broaching it. A toothpaste blob in the sink is not worth going ballistic. Although a toilet seat that is left up is. :smilie39:

greyzen
08-29-2007, 10:17
My wife and I just got married, we dated for like 2yrs...

I spend about 5 minutes a day telling her how wonderful and beautiful she is. I HOPE (and tell her so) that we will be like my grandparents.

My grandfather is the cook in the house. So everymorning before work he would get up, and go make breakfast (eggs, sausage/pancakes/etc.) for him and his wife.
They would eat breakfast and read the paper in the morning before work.
GO to work
3 - 4 times a week they would go to lunch together (working for different companies)
1 - 2 times a week they would go out to dinner together.

They've been doing that since they got married over 50 years ago.

BuzzF117
10-16-2007, 17:44
Laugh with your spouse even if your the butt of the laughter, if you can't laugh at yourself with the one you love then who can you laugh with

NEVER stop dating even when you kids are little once a month you need to get a sitter and go out even if its just to the grocery store together. Date nights can be inexpensive if you have a local college or community theater check out something there.

Daved
10-16-2007, 21:21
ohh stop it--you guys are going to make me cry!

Truth of the matter is:
I might wear the pants in the family--but she tells me which ones!

Tableleg
10-17-2007, 08:04
First, marry your best friend. I think this is the best piece of advice so far. When I married my ex-wife, I thought I married my best friend. I guess she saw things differently because some of her actions (the cause of the divorce) I would never do to any friend of mine.

Congrats to all you guys with 20+ year marriges! I wish you all 20 more happy years!

mpd525
10-18-2007, 09:52
and one i've recently figured out, if you 2 are having a spat, go diving, for a few reasons.

1--you both relax and calm down
2--you can't argue, you've got keep that reg in your mouth
3--i usually figure out i was a turd, so i apologize when were done
4--both will usually see something cool, and when you surface you talk about it, and get the argument out of your system.

marchand
10-18-2007, 12:48
and one i've recently figured out, if you 2 are having a spat, go diving, for a few reasons.

1--you both relax and calm down
2--you can't argue, you've got keep that reg in your mouth
3--i usually figure out i was a turd, so i apologize when were done
4--both will usually see something cool, and when you surface you talk about it, and get the argument out of your system.

Now that is some good advice

RoadRacer1978
10-18-2007, 13:45
Great advice from everyone with a little humor thrown in. Got 7 years down, working on 8. I changed careers so my wife could quit her job and be a stay at home mom. That is something she really wanted. I wash the dishes and do laundy on occassion when she gets a little backed up. I try to tell her how much I appreciate the things she does around the house. I'll bring her little things on occasion to show here how much I love her. And tell her multiple times each day how much I love her. I cook dinner when I am home so she can relax and take a little time off. I also take the kiddos and give them some father son time and let my wife get some time for herself.

cyclone
10-18-2007, 16:18
If a man says something in the woods and no one hears him... Is he still wrong?
Yep, I think it's universal... :smiley36: Say, " I'm wrong!!! I'm wrong!!!... Yes, It's my fault!!! It's my fault!!!:smilie39::smilie39::smilie39:

Foo2
10-18-2007, 18:48
*Warning* Girl in the room

Great advice from everyone with a little humor thrown in. Got 7 years down, working on 8. I changed careers so my wife could quit her job and be a stay at home mom. That is something she really wanted. I wash the dishes and do laundy on occassion when she gets a little backed up. I try to tell her how much I appreciate the things she does around the house. I'll bring her little things on occasion to show here how much I love her. And tell her multiple times each day how much I love her. I cook dinner when I am home so she can relax and take a little time off. I also take the kiddos and give them some father son time and let my wife get some time for herself.

You sound a lot like my husband. I also am a stay-at-home mom. While it is soooo much fun and I'm so blessed to get to be at home with my babies...it can make me quite tired. I think a lot of people think that being a SAHM is just sitting around at home, that is so far from the truth! They forget that we never leave our job, that it is 24 hours. I just want to say thank you for your wife. Way to be a great husband!:smiley32:

liuk3
10-19-2007, 12:55
I've only been married for 10 months so I don't have much to contribute except that we have a lot of fun together. Thanks for the advice!

DZorn00
10-19-2007, 13:10
If a man says something in the woods and no one hears him... Is he still wrong?

you must know my wife, even when she is not around I di something wrong, never fails.

divingmedic
10-19-2007, 13:46
If a man says something in the woods and no one hears him... Is he still wrong?


Yes because a woman somewhere will know he said something about anything and it will be wrong:smilie39:

mitsuguy
10-19-2007, 14:25
ya gotta be honest with each other, I've found...

we also just get along like we've been best friends since the 2nd grade...

it's been 6 months marriage, but 5 years as friends / dating...

and here in a bit we're moving out of the country to go diving together on a daily basis...

we're similar but not too similar... it's weird how we work so well... others ask us about our fights and stuff, and some have even said isn't it normal to fight... but in 5 years, not once... in the beginning there was some getting mad at one another going on, because we were just dating, but we never fought...

cyclone
10-19-2007, 15:32
I guess it differentiate and variates on the person whom you're going with. Honesty, commonality, respect and understanding will do a great part of admitting each others fault.:smiley20::smiley2:

Anne Eastwell
10-23-2007, 00:35
:smiley19: awwwww, how very metrosexual of you all.... This sounds like a topic we'd talk about in the womens forum!

Congrats to all you guys who have significant marriage milestones coming up! You're obviously doing something right, I hope your wives take the time to appreciate you too.

Don't forget to have fun, our worst times together are when we get too serious about stuff.

Hollywood703
10-23-2007, 07:24
Can not agree with all this Blasphomy.

nimeister
10-23-2007, 16:48
just dump em all they're so expensive j/k