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Aquatrax
12-18-2010, 10:50
During the day, a lot of thoughts pop into my man brain, some normal, some bizarre. I know I'm not alone (Scubastud, Largo) so I thought it might be therapeutic to have an outlet for such things. Just post the random thoughts that pop into your mind, we won't judge you.

I'll start

Aquatrax
12-18-2010, 11:01
I was thinking, the term "Zombie Testicle" doesn't come up in polite conversation as much as it used to, I blame the French.

Lulubelle
12-18-2010, 13:15
Hmm, my random thought is that I wonder what the incidence of discrete DSM IV diagnoses is amongst divers compared to that of the general population? IJS.

Aquatrax
12-18-2010, 13:37
Probably divers score higher in Axis IV, lucky for me, my foil hat counteracts the paint chips

TwistedSister209
12-18-2010, 13:51
"Balls!" cried the queen, "for if I had two, I'd be king!"

Lulubelle
12-18-2010, 14:53
Probably divers score higher in Axis IV, lucky for me, my foil hat counteracts the paint chips


Good about the foil hat. But I'm pretty sure that divers outscore the general population on a far broader scale than just Axis IV.

Aquatrax
12-18-2010, 16:32
"Balls!" cried the queen, "for if I had two, I'd be king!"


I won't ask what you were doing with that thought appeared :smiley2:

TwistedSister209
12-18-2010, 16:42
Actually, plotting out a story. Revenge, mahem, done-me-wrong. . .
It's just one of my favorite sayings!

Aquatrax
12-18-2010, 16:56
Mayhem is good, Throw in some Pillaging and Plundering

Aquatrax
12-18-2010, 16:56
I wonder why the good people of Mayberry never had an intervention with Otis?

Aquatrax
12-18-2010, 16:58
I wonder what my tongue taste like?

Splitlip
12-18-2010, 17:00
If Pluto is Mickey's dog, then what is Goofy?

Splitlip
12-18-2010, 17:02
And why can Goofy talk and walk on 2 legs, while Pluto can't? Why for that mas is Mickey able.

Splitlip
12-18-2010, 17:02
And if the Road Runner can by all those gadgets from ACME, why doesn't he just buy some food?

Splitlip
12-18-2010, 17:03
And if the Gilligan Island survivors can make a radio from a coconut, how come they can't fix a hole in a boat?

Aquatrax
12-18-2010, 17:13
The voice in head sounds like Jiverly Wong

dawnvip
12-18-2010, 17:39
And if the Road Runner can by all those gadgets from ACME, why doesn't he just buy some food?

It was the coyote that was buying all the gadgets to try to get the road runner. Here's what happened:

YouTube - Coyote and Roadrunner The Final Chapter (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=riY5ubYpFiQ)

Aquatrax
12-18-2010, 17:53
It was the coyote that was buying all the gadgets to try to get the road runner. Here's what happened:

YouTube - Coyote and Roadrunner The Final Chapter (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=riY5ubYpFiQ)


:smilie39:

bigman241
12-18-2010, 18:03
one random(maybe crazy) thought I have been having, that turned into an idea, and now a plan, was getting into buying foreclosed storage lockers, around here a huge waste of time, in florida, near Miami, the keys, not to bad of an idea. Going to look into it when we get settled, I already found the company that does the auctions.

bigman241
12-18-2010, 18:03
ohh another one has been why are all the good wreck at 130 feet deep.

bigman241
12-18-2010, 18:04
my question is if they can fix a radio why not come up with a coconut scuba tank, WHY WOULD YOU WANT TO LEAVE
And if the Gilligan Island survivors can make a radio from a coconut, how come they can't fix a hole in a boat?

scubajane
12-18-2010, 22:03
how much wood would a woodchuck chuck if a woodchuck could chuck wood???

inventor
12-18-2010, 22:11
how much wood would a woodchuck chuck if a woodchuck could chuck wood???

11....

navyhmc
12-19-2010, 03:04
0300 on Sunday morning... Dammm people! Quit yer drinkin and go home!!!!! And stop Driving!!!! in the past 20 minutes, there have been 5 etoh induced motor vehicle collisions - 22 since 8pm, 3 fatalities in the past 24 hours.

scubastud
12-19-2010, 06:36
Ever notice BJs feel better when you are holding a steering wheel?

scubagirlj
12-19-2010, 06:43
not if you're the pitcher

scubastud
12-19-2010, 06:48
you mean the catcher. :smiley2:

scubagirlj
12-19-2010, 06:53
you mean the catcher. :smiley2:
yeah, sorry, too early

scubajane
12-19-2010, 07:36
0300 on Sunday morning... Dammm people! Quit yer drinkin and go home!!!!! And stop Driving!!!! in the past 20 minutes, there have been 5 etoh induced motor vehicle collisions - 22 since 8pm, 3 fatalities in the past 24 hours.


ouch!!! apparently etoh makes them feel invincible.... thanks for all the hard work you do Navy!!

bfmorgan
12-19-2010, 07:45
Good about the foil hat. But I'm pretty sure that divers outscore the general population on a far broader scale than just Axis IV.
Based on my short history on the forum, the chosen professions, and the posts, people who dive definitely have certain personality traits in common. It might make for an interesting research project.

inventor
12-19-2010, 09:37
Based on my short history on the forum, the chosen professions, and the posts, people who dive definitely have certain personality traits in common. It might make for an interesting research project.

Let's get a grant! We'll have to see how being underwater affects this!

Aquatrax
12-19-2010, 11:08
Since prunes are dehydrated plums, where does prune juice come from?

dawnvip
12-19-2010, 12:23
I wonder if my Rottweilers will let me dress them up as reindeer?

Splitlip
12-19-2010, 12:26
http://www.petcentric.com/UploadedFiles/Images/Photos/a823d665-59fb-4e60-9d91-384fed4549cb_n.jpg

scubagirlj
12-19-2010, 12:30
http://www.petcentric.com/UploadedFiles/Images/Photos/a823d665-59fb-4e60-9d91-384fed4549cb_n.jpg
...the man ALWAYS has the answer! it never ceases to amaze me(as i shake my head in wonder).....
i said amaze, not amuse....its always amusing.

Lulubelle
12-19-2010, 12:37
Based on my short history on the forum, the chosen professions, and the posts, people who dive definitely have certain personality traits in common. It might make for an interesting research project.

Yah, and hopefully translate into how one can screen their potential dive buddies for :smiley29:

FoxHound
12-19-2010, 17:04
where is the nugget on a chicken, and im wondering where they find the buffalow with wings....do they give them redbull first or something....

Aquatrax
12-19-2010, 17:12
Do they still make Merkins? You know, for 70's night

bennerman
12-19-2010, 17:13
Ever stop to think and forget to start again?

bfmorgan
12-19-2010, 17:23
Ever stop to think and forget to start again?
Boy do I recognize this problem! Now I was thinking....

bfmorgan
12-19-2010, 17:25
Let's get a grant! We'll have to see how being underwater affects this!
It would have to be from the Federal Government...everyone else expects results that are applicable:smiley11:

Lulubelle
12-19-2010, 18:17
Men who wear tight uniforms, pack pistols, and have handcuffs dangling from their belt are HOT.

Aquatrax
12-19-2010, 18:20
Except for the Village People :smiley36:

Lulubelle
12-19-2010, 18:22
Except for the Village People :smiley36:

True that. Thanks for ruining my random thought.

Aquatrax
12-19-2010, 18:34
:smiley31::smiley31::smiley31::smiley31::smiley31: :smiley31::smiley31:

TwistedSister209
12-19-2010, 18:44
Men who wear tight uniforms, pack pistols, and have handcuffs dangling from their belt are HOT.

I prefer undercover operatives myself.

alpha
12-19-2010, 19:24
I prefer undercover operatives myself.

Photos from Bob & Carol & Ted & Alice (http://www.imdb.com/media/rm444636416/tt0064100)

TwistedSister209
12-19-2010, 19:28
Photos from Bob & Carol & Ted & Alice (http://www.imdb.com/media/rm444636416/tt0064100)

:smilie39::smilie39:
Not really that kind, Alpha! I don't share well.

inventor
12-19-2010, 20:57
New favourite quote:

American Dad - Stan: "All I can see Francine is you taking more poundings than Omaha Beach before the ground assault."

Splitlip
12-19-2010, 21:09
http://www.internationalhero.co.uk/g/ghwhowk2.jpg

inventor
12-19-2010, 21:19
http://www.internationalhero.co.uk/g/ghwhowk2.jpg
http://www.internationalhero.co.uk/g/ghwhowk2.jpg


http://www.richardemery.com/images/splitlip_2.jpg

I've commented on this similarity previously.

Splitlip
12-19-2010, 21:35
http://blog.dopetracks.com/wp-content/uploads/2010/06/patterson_bigfoot1.jpg

inventor
12-19-2010, 21:40
http://blog.dopetracks.com/wp-content/uploads/2010/06/patterson_bigfoot1.jpg


Well played, sir. Well played, indeed.

Why is your dry suit lining on the outside?

mzbdiver
12-20-2010, 00:21
Well played, sir. Well played, indeed.

Why is your dry suit lining on the outside?

What are you talking about... Split clearly was participating in "No Shave November" here...

SEMO Scuba
12-20-2010, 14:37
Men who wear tight uniforms, pack pistols, and have handcuffs dangling from their belt are HOT.

I could dress like that, but for some reason I don't think it would look HOT on me!!

scubagirlj
12-20-2010, 15:00
I could dress like that, but for some reason I don't think it would look HOT on me!!
you never know 'til you try..

scubastud
12-20-2010, 15:30
I guess not so random thought..

YouTube - Dan Fogelberg - Leader of the band "with lyrics" (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=qsocZrEcp0Y&feature=player_embedded)

Bert
12-20-2010, 15:48
if someonr w/nose piercing take out said piercing and sneezez does snot fly ou of the little hole?
is hooky pooky what its all about?

Vercingetorix
12-20-2010, 16:46
Men who wear tight uniforms, pack pistols, and have handcuffs dangling from their belt are HOT.



I could dress like that, but for some reason I don't think it would look HOT on me!!

you never know 'til you try..

He maybe right:
http://fatpeoplefail.com/wp-content/uploads/2009/03/fat-segway-cop.jpeg

Davetowz
12-20-2010, 16:48
:smilie39:
OMG!! That is just about the funniest thing I have seen in a loooonnngg time!! Thanks.

Aquatrax
12-20-2010, 17:37
Thunder Doodie

inventor
12-20-2010, 18:27
Santa Scuba Dives Off Florida Coast [VIDEO] (http://www.aolnews.com/2010/12/20/santa-scuba-dives-off-florida-coast-video/?a_dgi=aolshare_twitter)

scubajane
12-20-2010, 19:36
did Adam and Eve have belly buttons???

mm2002
12-20-2010, 19:47
Ever looked back and seen corn?

Davetowz
12-20-2010, 19:47
did Adam and Eve have belly buttons???
Wow, you need to be using Trimix to go that deep.

inventor
12-20-2010, 19:52
Ever looked back and seen corn?

Or peanuts?

TwistedSister209
12-20-2010, 19:54
Why do you have to clean the inside of a washing machine?

Davetowz
12-20-2010, 20:00
If chocalate and peanut butter are both brown, why is a reeses cup wrapper orange?

scubatrucker
12-20-2010, 21:35
I guess not so random thought..

YouTube - Dan Fogelberg - Leader of the band "with lyrics" (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=qsocZrEcp0Y&feature=player_embedded)
Deepest sympathies scubastud. That song changed meaning for me when my grandfather passed two years ago.

SEMO Scuba
12-22-2010, 12:51
He maybe right:
http://fatpeoplefail.com/wp-content/uploads/2009/03/fat-segway-cop.jpeg

I'm not nearly that far gone.....yet!

mm2002
12-22-2010, 17:30
Or peanuts?

Peanuts are the best aren't they. You can actually feel them pop out.

Davetowz
12-22-2010, 18:36
almost like lego's..

mm2002
12-22-2010, 19:23
almost like lego's..


You've poo'd lego's??? Damn, I gotta hear this story.....proceed.......

dawnvip
12-22-2010, 20:06
Am now officially unsubscribing to this thread. EEWWWWW!

Davetowz
12-22-2010, 20:14
some things are better left to wonder.....


Tequila...helping men eat things they really normally wouldn't since..............................

Davetowz
12-22-2010, 20:31
Too change the subject ;)

It's funny that the Russians use Cyrillic, we use Arabic, and the Arabs use chicken-scratch for their alphabets. Go figure that out and let me know when you have it all sorted.

inventor
12-22-2010, 22:55
Too change the subject ;)

It's funny that the Russians use Cyrillic, we use Arabic, and the Arabs use chicken-scratch for their alphabets. Go figure that out and let me know when you have it all sorted.


Really. Lay off the 12 packs.

Aquatrax
12-23-2010, 05:54
Moose Piss

Vercingetorix
12-23-2010, 07:17
My wife asked me if I slept well. I said no, I made a couple mistakes.

Aquatrax
12-23-2010, 10:44
I love chicks in Santa Hats............... Just Santa Hats

jans
12-23-2010, 11:00
8547Merry Christmas, Aquatrax.

Aquatrax
12-23-2010, 11:04
8547Merry Christmas, Aquatrax.

Funny, Hey I grew up in Ovilla

Aquatrax
12-23-2010, 11:06
OK, I grew older in Ovilla from whence I was a younger person

jans
12-23-2010, 11:07
Funny, Hey I grew up in Ovilla

It has changed a lot in the 17 years we have lived here. School in Midlothian ro Red Oak?

Aquatrax
12-23-2010, 11:13
Red Oak, yes, it was very much the country when I was there

scubajane
12-23-2010, 15:32
my sis tells a facinating story about changing a diaper full of used packing peanuts...

inventor
12-24-2010, 04:59
On hold yesterday. Realized one of the muzak tunes was the theme song to 'Welcome Back Kotter'.

scubagirlj
12-24-2010, 05:18
is arklatex a real place or is someone pulling my leg?

mm2002
12-24-2010, 05:35
is arklatex a real place or is someone pulling my leg?


It's at the junction of Arkansas, Texas, and Lousiana

Vercingetorix
12-24-2010, 06:15
When you fill-out a form you fill-in the blanks.

TwistedSister209
12-24-2010, 06:47
Nature abhors a vacuum.
And so do I.

bfmorgan
12-24-2010, 10:32
If I were to meet a forum member face to face, would I recognize them?

Aquatrax
12-24-2010, 11:01
Nature abhors a vacuum.
And so do I.

Me too, you should see my carpets

scubajane
12-24-2010, 11:05
If I were to meet a forum member face to face, would I recognize them?

I met platypus man he looked just like his avatar.... # 14 or 15.

then again we only know your face by your avatar so uhhh probably not. I think when I meet you I could introduce myself as foo2 and you would never know the difference.

scubatrucker
12-24-2010, 13:14
Anybody want to come to the house and wrap all these presents for me?

Anybody?

Aquatrax
12-24-2010, 14:21
Crotch Strap! I don't know, it just popped in my mind

jans
12-24-2010, 15:17
With friends last night and all the kids went outside to play hide & seek after dark, they all had night vision goggles.... just seems wrong.

scubajane
12-24-2010, 21:29
why do we park "IN" the driveway and drive "ON" the parkway????
If the Brits drive on the wrong side of the road do they drive on the bottom under the asphalt???

scubajane
12-24-2010, 21:30
what is the difference between 'pretty awful' and 'awful pretty' ??? I'm using the same words!!

mm2002
12-24-2010, 21:53
why do we park "IN" the driveway and drive "ON" the parkway????
If the Brits drive on the wrong side of the road do they drive on the bottom under the asphalt???


on kind of the same note (but really different), why do we keep cars worth tens of thousands of dollars outside in the driveway while the garage is stuffed full of a bunch of worthless junk.

Lulubelle
12-24-2010, 22:09
Anybody want to come to the house and wrap all these presents for me?

Anybody?

Sure, you live further south, right? Do I get to keep any of them?

scubatrucker
12-25-2010, 00:36
Sure, you live further south, right? Do I get to keep any of them?
Sure, but you'll have to fight my 3 and 5 y/o nieces for the Barbie playsets. And I'll fight you for the Piranha Dive Mfg. light and knife I got for my brother. I almost kept them for myself.

Davetowz
12-25-2010, 01:02
YouTube - The Nut Bra (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=cALMqlFUebI)
hmmmm.... random thoughts for sure.....

navyhmc
12-25-2010, 05:05
Why do toasters always have a setting that burns the toast to a horrible crisp, which no decent human being would eat?

TwistedSister209
12-25-2010, 06:37
YouTube - The Nut Bra (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=cALMqlFUebI)
hmmmm.... random thoughts for sure.....
Sick. . . I loved it.

There is a direct relationship between dogs, mud and company.

inventor
12-25-2010, 14:23
Reading about anarchists sending letter bombs in Italy. Described as an organization with a couple hundred members. Isn't that actually the opposite of anarchy? Somebody get these guys a dictionary.

Lulubelle
12-25-2010, 16:43
And I'll fight you for the Piranha Dive Mfg. light and knife I got for my brother. I almost kept them for myself.

You are on! I can take you. Been training with a guy who trains MMA fighters.

scubagirlj
12-25-2010, 18:55
happy 64th b'day jimmy buffett!

Aquatrax
12-25-2010, 18:55
I bet Georgia O'keeffe and Jackson Pollock hook up in the afterlife

mm2002
12-25-2010, 19:27
Why do people think they have to dive reefs with their hands buckled together? I hate seeing those pics.

inventor
12-26-2010, 15:39
Of course you all know that the three wise men were West Virginia firefighters? Says so right in the bible....







It says they came from afar!

Davetowz
12-26-2010, 21:09
Of course you all know that the three wise men were West Virginia firefighters? Says so right in the bible....







It says they came from afar!
That was actually said almost verbatim by the priest During Christmas eve Mass. he is a funny guy.
and no...I did not get struck by lightning... God must have been busy.

scubatrucker
12-26-2010, 22:36
Any body know why pounds is abreviated lbs?

Davetowz
12-26-2010, 22:50
Yep, based on latin Libra pondo. also the constellation libra which many think resembles scales.

TwistedSister209
12-27-2010, 18:31
Bourbon Balls

scubatrucker
12-27-2010, 18:49
Oooooh bourbon balls and crab stuffed mushrooms

navyhmc
12-27-2010, 19:12
Rum balls...or better yet: instead of rum balls, same recipe with Drambui and Baileys!!!

scubajane
12-27-2010, 21:14
have you seen those things that dangle from the back end of redneck pickup trucks???

navyhmc
12-27-2010, 21:56
have you seen those things that dangle from the back end of redneck pickup trucks???

Those are bull balls, don't know for sure, but I'll go on a limb and say they're not quite as tasty as rum balls. :smiley36:

scubajane
12-28-2010, 16:40
ewwwwwe don't put that nasty thing in your mouth!!!!!!

Davetowz
12-28-2010, 22:18
all I am going to say is "Franks Red Hot". mmmmm.mmmmmmmmmm..goood. makes all things edible.

Vercingetorix
12-29-2010, 06:21
Those are bull balls, don't know for sure, but I'll go on a limb and say they're not quite as tasty as rum balls. :smiley36:

That's the problem with you, high-class, uppity, big city, Witchita, folks, with your urban attitudes...ya just don't know good eatin'.

Google "Rocky Mountain Oysters

Rocky Mountain Oysters
Recipe

2 pounds calf testicles*
2 cups beer
2 eggs,
beaten
1 cups all-purpose flour
cup yellow cornmea1
Salt and ground
black pepper to taste
Vegetable oil**
1 tablespoon hot pepper
sauce

*
Be sure to ask your butcher for calf testicles, not bull testicles. Calf
testicles are the size of a walnut and are much more tender than the larger bull
testicles.

** Use enough vegetable oil to fill
your frying container halfway to the top (to allow for bubbling up and
splattering) and to completely cover calf testicles while frying.

With a very sharp knife, split the tough skin-like
muscle that surrounds each testicle. Remove the skin (you can remove the skin
easily if the testicles are frozen, then peel while thawing). Slice each
testicle into approximately 1/4- to 1/2-inch-thick ovals. Place slices in a
large pan or blow with enough beer to cover them; cover and let sit 2
hours.

In a shallow bowl, combine eggs, flour, cornmeal, salt, and pepper. Remove testicles from beer; drain and dredge thoroughly in the flour mixture. In a large, deep pot, heat oil to 375 degrees F. Deep fry 3
minutes or until golden brown (will rise to the surface when done). Drain on paper towels.

Serve warm with your favorite hot pepper


sauce.

navyhmc
12-29-2010, 10:44
Rick, you're comparing the fried reproductive organs of a bovine with the amborsia-esque blending of Chocolate and Rum??? Can't be done my friend. Booze and Chocolate win out every time.

Upitty big cty types???? Wichita???? Huh!??? We're about as cosmopolitan as a dualie pick up....:smiley36:

Gonnagettanked
12-29-2010, 12:18
Bain de Solie for the San Tropez tan

Vercingetorix
12-29-2010, 13:15
Los Angeles' full name is "El Pueblo de Nuestra Senora la Reina de los Angeles de Porciuncula

Vercingetorix
12-29-2010, 13:19
Rick, you're comparing the fried reproductive organs of a bovine with the amborsia-esque blending of Chocolate and Rum??? Can't be done my friend. Booze and Chocolate win out every time.

I totally agree. You cannot have too much chocolate.


Upitty big cty types???? Wichita???? Huh!??? We're about as cosmopolitan as a dualie pick up....

Well, I'm writing from a quiet little railroad town called Irving, Texas (pop. 200K). As PlatypusMan refers to it, the "Hotbed of Apathy"

So, yeah, Wichita is uppity :)

SEMO Scuba
12-29-2010, 13:59
Rick,
When I had them oysters I thought they was chicken. Wuz I wrong???

scubajane
12-29-2010, 15:05
chickens have testicles??? where???

inventor
12-29-2010, 15:09
chickens have testicles??? where???

Right under the ovaries.
But they aren't as large as a rooster's.

TwistedSister209
12-29-2010, 19:24
Rogue-Wave-Sniper-Treasure

SEMO Scuba
12-29-2010, 19:37
Inventor alcohol was involved that day. Since you mentioned rooster I remember that they were called 'Rooster Fries'.

I thought those sure are large to have come from such a small critter. Roosters got big uns.

Vercingetorix
12-29-2010, 21:00
Rick,
When I had them oysters I thought they was chicken. Wuz I wrong???

Everything "tastes like chicken".

Davetowz
12-29-2010, 23:01
Upitty big cty types???? Wichita???? Huh!??? We're about as cosmopolitan as a dualie pick up....:smiley36:
What is wrong with a duallie? ( mine looks very cosmo, esp. with the fuzzy dice on the mirror) And I am posting from a town of 250. (not including dogs or livestock)

Davetowz
12-29-2010, 23:02
Everything "tastes like chicken".
I have had some mess hall chicken that didn't taste like chicken.

navyhmc
12-30-2010, 01:02
Rick, you're comparing the fried reproductive organs of a bovine with the amborsia-esque blending of Chocolate and Rum??? Can't be done my friend. Booze and Chocolate win out every time.




I totally agree. You cannot have too much chocolate.


Upitty big cty types???? Wichita???? Huh!??? We're about as cosmopolitan as a dualie pick up....:smiley36:


Well, I'm writing from a quiet little railroad town called Irving, Texas (pop. 200K). As PlatypusMan refers to it, the "Hotbed of Apathy"

So, yeah, Wichita is uppity :)

Well 'scuse me...get yur'n butt up this way and tip back a cold one...hell, we'll even give you a glass! But you got's to go to KCMO fer a frosted glass, they are uppitty cusses. :smilie39:

Vercingetorix
12-30-2010, 08:07
I have had some mess hall chicken that didn't taste like chicken.

I dunno, man. Some of the best eating in the world is from the chow hall. I was USAF for ten years and I ate in the chow hall every chance I could. Good food, lots of it, cheap prices. Downside is that I would add weight where I don't need it.

If you want REALY good eats, go to an aircraft carrier mess hall. Those chefs, yes I DO mean chefs, are amazing.


Well 'scuse me...get yur'n butt up this way and tip back a cold one...hell, we'll even give you a glass! But you got's to go to KCMO fer a frosted glass, they are uppitty cusses. :smilie39:

I'll bring the beer, homebrew of course. You may want a glass; otherwise, you'll get a mouthful of yeast with that last swallow from the bottle.

Davetowz
12-30-2010, 09:05
You said it....USAF...USN!! I was Navy, had a great MS on my favorite destroyer, Cuban, made great chili. I have worked on AF bases. My favorite is the Navy DFAC @ Bolling AFB, Yum!

inventor
12-31-2010, 16:50
Scientists Create First Self-Replicating Synthetic Life | Wired Science | Wired.com (http://www.wired.com/wiredscience/2010/05/scientists-create-first-self-replicating-synthetic-life/)

Soooo....Does the zombie apocalypse begin or end Dec 21, 2012?

And the survivors will also have to fend of the brocolli monkeys mentioned previously.

This ain't gonna end well.

Davetowz
01-02-2011, 00:22
Hmmmm.... can brocolli really kill a zombie... Have to try that one!

inventor
01-02-2011, 03:25
Guy walks into a bar..
Go figure.
...With a dog.
Bartender says, "We can't have him in here, it violates the health codes."
Guy says, "But wait, it's the world's smartest dog. He can even talk."
Bartender: "Right, prove it."
Guy: "What's under tree?"
Dog "Root!"
Guy: "What's on top of a house?"
Dog: "Roof!"
Guy: "Who's the greatest baseball player that ever lived?"
Dog: "Ruth!"
So the bartender throws them out into the gutter.
Dog looks up at the guy..."Dimaggio?"

Aquatrax
01-02-2011, 06:43
Swamp Donkey

Vercingetorix
01-02-2011, 07:21
You can't have everything. Where would you put it?

scubajane
01-02-2011, 12:11
You can't have everything. Where would you put it?


everywhere

TwistedSister209
01-02-2011, 17:15
Common sense isn't common.

navyhmc
01-02-2011, 19:52
You can't have everything. Where would you put it?

If I had everything, I would also have a place to put it... DUH!!!! :smiley36:

If God can do anything, can he make a rock too big for him to lift?

Vercingetorix
01-02-2011, 20:10
If God can do anything, can he make a rock too big for him to lift?

Such a rock would be greater than any star. Thus, it would be suspended in the void of space, whereby it would be acted upon by the graivational pull of all bodies throughout the universe. The effect of this is neutral gravity. In order "to lift", there must be gravity to act against. Given, there would be neutral gravity, it could not be "lifted" as we understand. So, the answer is unsolvable.

Any other questions?

inventor
01-02-2011, 22:29
This is the age old argument, what happens when an irresistable force meets an immovable object? The answer is, Chuck Norris wins.

bennerman
01-02-2011, 22:34
Why is it that airline peanuts claim that they "may contain peanuts"? I mean, I would certainly hope so

Davetowz
01-02-2011, 23:01
what happens when Chuck Norris gets angry at himself?

inventor
01-02-2011, 23:17
what happens when Chuck Norris gets angry at himself?

He wins.

Lulubelle
01-02-2011, 23:19
This is the age old argument, what happens when an irresistable force meets an immovable object? The answer is, Chuck Norris wins.

Ya must have missed this one.

http://forum.scubatoys.com/fun-games-72/chuck-norris-debunked-34898/

navyhmc
01-03-2011, 00:55
Such a rock would be greater than any star. Thus, it would be suspended in the void of space, whereby it would be acted upon by the graivational pull of all bodies throughout the universe. The effect of this is neutral gravity. In order "to lift", there must be gravity to act against. Given, there would be neutral gravity, it could not be "lifted" as we understand. So, the answer is unsolvable.

Any other questions?

Wow! You are GOOD!!!

inventor
01-03-2011, 01:42
Such a rock would be greater than any star. Thus, it would be suspended in the void of space, whereby it would be acted upon by the graivational pull of all bodies throughout the universe. The effect of this is neutral gravity. In order "to lift", there must be gravity to act against. Given, there would be neutral gravity, it could not be "lifted" as we understand. So, the answer is unsolvable.

Any other questions?

What if the rock where three feet to the left of that position?
The universe is not in equilibrium, nor is all matter evenly distributed.

Vercingetorix
01-03-2011, 07:38
What if the rock where three feet to the left of that position?

Well then...we all die.


The universe is not in equilibrium, nor is all matter evenly distributed.

But, it is a closed system. So, eventually, equilibrium will be achieved ever so briefly, before the orbits decay and all matter, again, crashes in upon itself to a central location. Once it's all collapsed, we have another Big Bang. Will it be the second Big Bang? The fifth? The hundreth? The millionth? Who knows how many times the Universe has imploded and exploded. All nature is cyclic. Kinda like SS returning to his waffles.

inventor
01-03-2011, 10:56
Actor that played Kobiashi in 'The Usual Suspects' passed away...

Oscar-nominated star Pete Postlethwaite dies at 64 - Yahoo! News (http://news.yahoo.com/s/ap/eu_britain_obit_postlethwaite;_ylt=AloxVwIwboKXgbk a4Gt3PPW9IxIF;_ylu=X3oDMTNiM2tucDZmBGFzc2V0Ay9zL2F wL2V1X2JyaXRhaW5fb2JpdF9wb3N0bGV0aHdhaXRlBGNjb2RlA 21wX2VjXzhfMTAEY3BvcwMzBHBvcwMzBHNlYwN5bl90b3Bfc3R vcmllcwRzbGsDb3NjYXItbm9taW5h)

I think it was Kiser Soze...

mzbdiver
01-03-2011, 12:39
Well then...we all die.



But, it is a closed system. So, eventually, equilibrium will be achieved ever so briefly, before the orbits decay and all matter, again, crashes in upon itself to a central location. Once it's all collapsed, we have another Big Bang. Will it be the second Big Bang? The fifth? The hundreth? The millionth? Who knows how many times the Universe has collapsed and exploded. All nature is cyclic. Kinda like SS returning to his waffles.

This is getting way to existential for me...

scubatrucker
01-04-2011, 10:27
dead malls and night falls

Vercingetorix
01-04-2011, 11:52
Some friends and I were sitting around drinking a delightful and fruity Pinot Noir and discussing French absudist tragedies. We sparked upon its influences, when, of course, we explored Six Characters In Search of An Author, by Luigi Pirandello. As you can imagine, the discussion was quite spirited. As we opened a 2001 Cabernet, the discussion was getting heated, when all of a sudden, the guy to my left says, "Yes, but what of the duck?" We were struck dumbfounded. Then, we burst out laughing. "Of course," I said. "How could we have missed it?" So very obvious.

Yes, these are the times I most cherish.

Vercingetorix
01-04-2011, 11:54
Me: Make me a sandwich

Wife: POOF! you're a sandwich!

Noob
01-04-2011, 12:20
why are drive ways where you park and park ways where you drive?

navyhmc
01-04-2011, 14:21
On God's birthday, does he get omni-presents?

scubajane
01-04-2011, 17:37
Some friends and I were sitting around drinking a delightful and fruity Pinot Noir and discussing French absudist tragedies. We sparked upon its influences, when, of course, we explored Six Characters In Search of An Author, by Luigi Pirandello. As you can imagine, the discussion was quite spirited. As we opened a 2001 Cabernet, the discussion was getting heated, when all of a sudden, the guy to my left says, "Yes, but what of the duck?" We were struck dumbfounded. Then, we burst out laughing. "Of course," I said. "How could we have missed it?" So very obvious.

Yes, these are the times I most cherish.


this is V, not playing with a full duck

Bert
01-04-2011, 18:16
how far cout you "jet propell" your self, in the international space station with beer and beans?

Aquatrax
01-04-2011, 18:36
Fire Good!

navyhmc
01-04-2011, 19:02
Fire hot!

bfmorgan
01-04-2011, 19:22
Fire Call

Davetowz
01-04-2011, 19:25
Fire Yummy!

Aquatrax
01-04-2011, 19:28
Fire Woman

TwistedSister209
01-04-2011, 19:38
Fire Ball!

scubatrucker
01-04-2011, 19:45
Firefall

TwistedSister209
01-04-2011, 19:50
Fire fight

mzbdiver
01-04-2011, 20:07
If two trains leave Union station, the first traveling 35 MPH the other 43.141592653841 MPH how long will it take until...

Wait a minute... no one cares!

scubatrucker
01-04-2011, 20:11
When a tree falls in the forest, does a soufle rise in the city?

navyhmc
01-04-2011, 21:08
If a tree falls and hits a mime, does anyone care?

scubatrucker
01-04-2011, 21:28
Depends if the mime will express his disbelieve through annoying hand gestures

Vercingetorix
01-05-2011, 06:48
If at first you don't succeed...then skydiving is not your sport.

Panmanmatt
01-05-2011, 08:34
The mind is like a parachute, it only works when opened.

Gonnagettanked
01-05-2011, 11:08
What if the hokey pokey is what it's all about?

TJDiver
01-05-2011, 11:28
If at first you don't succeed...then skydiving is not your sport.

True dat! :smiley36:

BTW, if a mime's parachute fails, will his invisible ladder save him?

Lulubelle
01-05-2011, 15:45
I wonder if we could collectively ask Larry to go ahead and grant davepoff his gift card for his 250th post a bit early?

scubajane
01-05-2011, 18:55
fire at Will......
what did Will do wrong??????




If a tree falls in the woods is the man still wrong????

Davetowz
01-05-2011, 19:10
If a tree falls in the woods is the man still wrong????

of course he is.

Aquatrax
01-05-2011, 19:28
Is it too ironic to have my home lobotomy kit delivered by a postal worker

navyhmc
01-05-2011, 19:36
Is it too ironic to have my home lobotomy kit delivered by a postal worker

About as ironic as an old post office here was converted into a gun range....Honest!

Davetowz
01-05-2011, 19:45
I just did the DIY version.

TwistedSister209
01-05-2011, 20:37
The sh8t flew at random, but Random ducked.

Aquatrax
01-06-2011, 05:36
About as ironic as an old post office here was converted into a gun range....Honest!

:smilie39:

Vercingetorix
01-06-2011, 06:15
I wonder if we could collectively ask Larry to go ahead and grant davepoff his gift card for his 250th post a bit early?

It was funny in that he commented on EVERY item that Larry posted. I find it hard to believe he has everything. Prior to his 21 Dec post, he was off the forum for three years.

Aquatrax
01-06-2011, 08:08
It was funny in that he commented on EVERY item that Larry posted. I find it hard to believe he has everything. Prior to his 21 Dec post, he was off the forum for three years.

No time to post on the forum, collecting that much gear takes a lot of shopping, then you have to dive it all, whew, I'm tired just thinking about it

TJDiver
01-06-2011, 10:49
I met a girl in the park the other evening.


There was an instant spark between us
and she immediately dropped to her knees
and laid on the grass at my feet.


As we lay making love, I thought
"These taser guns are well worth the money."

scubajane
01-06-2011, 14:44
you are bad so bad!!!!!
sit ubu

TJDiver
01-06-2011, 15:31
Woof! :smiley36:

baywatch106
01-06-2011, 16:12
Love it!

TwistedSister209
01-06-2011, 17:47
:smilie39::smilie39::smilie39::smilie39::smilie39:

TJ--- you're incorirgible!

Davetowz
01-06-2011, 18:28
I have to try that method.

inventor
01-07-2011, 01:12
I met a girl in the park the other evening.

There was an instant spark between us
and she immediately dropped to her knees
and laid on the grass at my feet.

As we lay making love, I thought
"These taser guns are well worth the money."

You sir, are worse than Hitler eating a kitten's soul.

Bert
01-07-2011, 04:38
if a man farts under water does it still smell?


(growing old is manditory growing up is optional)

Bert
01-07-2011, 04:39
the other day I was accoused of acting my shoe size I thought becalled 10 and 1/2 was giving me too mutch credit

John Yaskowich
01-07-2011, 14:20
Any simple problem can be made unsolvable if enough meetings are held to discuss it.

scubajane
01-07-2011, 15:33
how about the peter principle. you get promoted because you do a good job. then when you can no longer do your job you are never promoted. forever to be unsuccessful in your current job!!

Aquatrax
01-08-2011, 16:58
Where can I find sanctuary?

TwistedSister209
01-08-2011, 17:38
Where can I find sanctuary?
In a church!
In the woods!
Under the water!

Spreadin' the sh*t is a lot like spreadin' the

scubajane
01-08-2011, 18:44
at the aviary

jans
01-09-2011, 21:17
Why does neoprene flatten your boobs but not your tummy?

Lulubelle
01-10-2011, 05:40
Why does neoprene flatten your boobs but not your tummy?

I wish that it would flatten either. But the tummy thing, yeah, might as well put a highlighter on it.

Lulubelle
01-10-2011, 05:40
Who are these freaks who like to get up when it is DARK. Ugh. More coffee before my workout...

scubajane
01-10-2011, 14:32
I wish that it would flatten either. But the tummy thing, yeah, might as well put a highlighter on it.


well there goes another keyboard!!!!

Davetowz
01-10-2011, 15:56
beige, definitely beige...

Aquatrax
01-10-2011, 16:02
Please make it stop

Lulubelle
01-10-2011, 18:11
I learned a new word from a man today. First time, ever.

Concupiscence - Wikipedia, the free encyclopedia (http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Concupiscence)

It was in a dive blog about squid, for the record.

scubajane
01-10-2011, 20:36
I learned a new word from a man today. First time, ever.

Concupiscence - Wikipedia, the free encyclopedia (http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Concupiscence)

It was in a dive blog about squid, for the record.



so you already know about premarital interdigital phalangiation???

inventor
01-10-2011, 20:45
so you already know about premarital interdigital phalangiation???


There are young people on this forum! And a young lady of your station and upbringing shouldn't even know about such things!

My word, next you'll be telling us you not only masticated freely at the dinner table, that you where encouraged to do so!

scubajane
01-10-2011, 20:50
you are a goofball!!!!! said in a a quite loving manner

Lulubelle
01-10-2011, 20:50
so you already know about premarital interdigital phalangiation???

:smilie39::smilie39::smilie39: Yes, for some time now. Hope it continues on postmaritally.

scubajane
01-10-2011, 20:52
:smilie39::smilie39::smilie39: Yes, for some time now. Hope it continues on postmaritally.




I practice almost daily some times multiple times in the same day ;)

scubastud
01-10-2011, 20:53
Hey!
Why didn't anyone here tell me there is a fake Sudafed out there, and ya have to ask for the real stuff -they keep it behind the counter now.

I was all like damn, this stuff doesn't work anymore.
Apparently they took out the ingredient that dopeheads use to make crack.

Lulubelle
01-10-2011, 20:55
Hey!
Why didn't anyone here tell me there is a fake Sudafed out there, and ya have to ask for the real stuff -they keep it behind the counter now.

I was all like damn, this stuff doesn't work anymore.
Apparently they took out the ingredient that dopeheads use to make crack.

Because it happened YEARS ago? And that would be the crystal meth heads.

Aquatrax
01-10-2011, 20:56
I practice almost daily some times multiple times in the same day ;)

I saw my grandparents doing this behind the barn

Lulubelle
01-10-2011, 20:57
I practice almost daily some times multiple times in the same day ;)

MULTIPLE? And here I thought you were a nice girl. You brazen hussy.

I haven't practiced it in a long time. I'm holding out for someone worthy. They aren't easy to find.

Lulubelle
01-10-2011, 20:58
I saw my grandparents doing this behind the barn

Is that what messed you up in the head AT? I'll bring extra meds.

scubastud
01-10-2011, 21:01
Aww thanks LuLu for makin me feel even stupidderer.

And excuuuuse me for not knowing the street names of illegal drugs.

xoxoxo :smiley2:

Lulubelle
01-10-2011, 21:08
Aww thanks LuLu for makin me feel even stupidderer.

And excuuuuse me for not knowing the street names of illegal drugs.

xoxoxo :smiley2:

That is not the street name and wasn't intending to make you feel stupid. That is the drug itself, methamphetamine. Street names galore. Quite possibly the nastiest addiction on the planet.

Aquatrax
01-11-2011, 05:37
The chicks in yoga class are bendy, Hmmm, Yoga Sutra? (Copyright)

Vercingetorix
01-11-2011, 05:39
Heaven is where the police are British; the chefs are Italian; the mechanics are German; the lovers are French; and, it's all organized by the Swiss.

Hell is where the police are German; the chefs are British; the mechanics are French; the lovers are Swiss; and, it's all organized by the Italians.

Aquatrax
01-11-2011, 05:44
Heaven is where the police are British; the chefs are Italian; the mechanics are German; the lovers are French; and, it's all organized by the Swiss.

Hell is where the police are German; the chefs are British; the mechanics are French; the lovers are Swiss; and, it's all organized by the Italians.

:smilie39: Genius

mzbdiver
01-11-2011, 09:15
:smilie39: Genius

Haha!!!!!!!!

Lulubelle
01-13-2011, 06:31
Why can't scuba divers SPELL worth a darn?

And why do they all insist on spelling Morehead as Moorehead when I have just invited them to come dive in Morehead and put it right out there in front of them? Oy vey.

scubastud
01-13-2011, 06:37
You are right Luuluuballe.

scubastud
01-13-2011, 07:09
this should be post number 2,000.

Vercingetorix
01-13-2011, 07:53
this should be post number 2,000.

I'm sorry, but this post doesn't count. We Mods have taken a keen interest in Mr ScubaStud's post, given his obsession with waffles and the like. We're reviewing all his posts, and certain ones may be disqualified.

With that in mind:

http://s.myniceprofile.com/myspacepic/482/48269.jpg

mzbdiver
01-13-2011, 09:57
I'm sorry, but this post doesn't count. We Mods have taken a keen interest in Mr ScubaStud's post, given his obsession with waffles and the like. We're reviewing all his posts, and certain ones may be disqualified.

With that in mind:

http://s.myniceprofile.com/myspacepic/482/48269.jpg

I say for the comical factor of some posts that they all should count. SS brightens my day.

Aquatrax
01-13-2011, 12:24
Why can't scuba divers SPELL worth a darn?

And why do they all insist on spelling Morehead as Moorehead when I have just invited them to come dive in Morehead and put it right out there in front of them? Oy vey.

Meybe htay wer siting in a darc ruum an it wuz vary urly.:smiley2:

Let me try, worth a darn, Ha, Perfect!

TwistedSister209
01-13-2011, 13:45
Sad thing is that I can still read what AT wrote.

Aquatrax
01-13-2011, 18:58
LA Fitness is such a pleasant sounding name, why must it hurt so much. I thought the name was French and there would be pastry, way off base on that one

Aquatrax
01-13-2011, 19:00
Sad thing is that I can still read what AT wrote.

Oh TS, reading my post will only lead to trouble

Lulubelle
01-13-2011, 19:29
LA Fitness is such a pleasant sounding name, why must it hurt so much. I thought the name was French and there would be pastry, way off base on that one

Because it gives you that muscular butt that you boast of. Of which I will be getting photos.

Aquatrax
01-13-2011, 19:45
Because it gives you that muscular butt that you boast of. Of which I will be getting photos.

Macro?

Lulubelle
01-13-2011, 19:47
Macro?

Depends on how good it looks whether or not I want to get that close.:smiley2:

Davetowz
01-13-2011, 20:11
I find this string of posts pretty funny!!

TwistedSister209
01-13-2011, 20:51
I like trouble. Trouble follows me around.
Lulu--pictures! I want pictures.

Wii boxing cheats!

scubastud
01-13-2011, 21:37
LA Fitness isn't a waffle shop!!??

inventor
01-13-2011, 22:13
It's a tale that has all the trappings of a cult 1960s sci-fi movie: Scientists bring back ancient salt crystals, dug up from deep below Death Valley for climate research. The sparkling crystals are carefully packed away until, years later, a young, unknown researcher takes a second look at the 34,000-year-old crystals and discovers, trapped inside, something strange. Something … alive.

34,000-year-old bacteria discovered...and it's still alive - CSMonitor.com (http://www.csmonitor.com/Science/2011/0113/34-000-year-old-bacteria-discovered-and-it-s-still-alive)

Like I said..The frickin Mayans could have mentioned it would be zombies! Hmmm... Death Valley, oh, just thinking...SOMEPLACE THE MAYANS HAD ACCESS TO!!!!

Davetowz
01-13-2011, 23:06
I would prob eat the waffles at LA fitness.hahahaha :)

Aquatrax
01-14-2011, 05:31
I would prob eat the waffles at LA fitness.hahahaha :)

Order Up,

Dave needs a half stack of Andro-cakes with carmelized creatine topping and a side of anabolic bacon, extra extra extra crispy.

Breakfast is the most important meal of the day! Just ask the meathead over in the free weight area bench pressing the leg press machine.

Vercingetorix
01-14-2011, 06:25
I like trouble. Trouble follows me around.
Lulu--pictures! I want pictures!

Of Aquatrax butt? Or Lulu?

I'll pass on the former (not enough eye bleach). And give a big :smiley20: on the latter. Alas, we guys have begged for years without success.

Lulubelle
01-14-2011, 06:32
I like trouble. Trouble follows me around.
Lulu--pictures! I want pictures.

Wii boxing cheats!

You know Twisted, Trouble follows me around, finds any crack or crevice through which it can come into my life, and just has a heyday. So maybe I just need to start welcoming it and enjoying it more. Good perspective, one I came to before my first sip of coffee.

If it is at all photogenic, I will get pictures of the alleged muscular butt.

Lulubelle
01-14-2011, 06:36
Of Aquatrax butt? Or Lulu?

I'll pass on the former (not enough eye bleach). And give a big :smiley20: on the latter. Alas, we guys have begged for years without success.

Not my best feature V, though there are others which some may consider photo worthy.

Vercingetorix
01-14-2011, 06:59
Not my best feature V, though there are others which some may consider photo worthy.

Ahem. I was NOT referring specifically to YOUR posterior region. Rather, I DON'T want to see Aquatrax's. Any photos of you would be fine. Do you have a French maid's outfit?

Lulubelle
01-14-2011, 07:01
Ahem. I was NOT referring specifically to YOUR posterior region. Rather, I DON'T want to see Aquatrax's. Any photos of you would be fine. Do you have a French maid's outfit?

Not yet. I'll see what I can do. Do they make those in neoprene though? It is a dive trip after all.

Vercingetorix
01-14-2011, 07:38
My wife has already ordered my cake for next month...sigh...

http://chzemokid.files.wordpress.com/2011/01/emo-scene-hipster-emo-cake.jpg