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View Full Version : I can tell you are a new diver when........



bfmorgan
01-18-2011, 18:14
I can tell you are a new diver when....
you sink like a rock.

New divers are usually over weighted and lack buoyancy control.

Complete the sentence "I can tell you are a new diver when....."

Hopefully, I can learn what not to do!

Smashee
01-18-2011, 18:37
Complete the sentence "I can tell you are a new diver when....."

You get excited at seeing what more experienced divers take for granted.
(This is a Good Thing. Try to hang on to that sense of wonder as long as possible, please. It's one of the reasons why I like teaching newer divers. )

scubajane
01-18-2011, 18:55
you keep flooding your mask. ... it take a while to remember that smiling breaks the seal on your mask.

Davetowz
01-18-2011, 19:15
you keep flooding your mask. ... it take a while to remember that smiling breaks the seal on your mask.
Good one! I still do this!

bottomdweller
01-18-2011, 19:22
When you strap your BC on the tank backwards...

tacofranklin
01-18-2011, 19:46
try to vent your bc with your snorkel

bennerman
01-18-2011, 19:50
Or wears their snorkel

navyhmc
01-18-2011, 19:54
When you strap your BC on the tank backwards...

or upside down....


try to vent your bc with your snorkel

What is this snorkel you speak of???

scubagirlj
01-18-2011, 19:54
Or wears their snorkel
THATS the sign of a newbie, hands down! 1+ b'man!

bennerman
01-18-2011, 19:55
THATS the sign of a newbie, hands down! 1+ b'man!

but -1,000,000 for actually still wearing mine :p

Straegen
01-18-2011, 20:08
... when the reg is put on upside down

... by how new and unscuffed their gear is

... the way they look at every other diver trying to figure out what they are doing

... by how much equipment space they consume on a boat while gearing up

... when they come up quickly because they cannot see out of their fogged mask

... when everything has a bag or a box that it goes into/out of before going into/out of the dive bag

... when they cannot figure out how to use their dive computer just before the dive

Davetowz
01-18-2011, 20:14
When you are afraid to pee in your wetsuit

Straegen
01-18-2011, 20:15
... when you are not sure if the new guy is drowning or simply flailing around with their arms trying to turn around underwater

tacofranklin
01-18-2011, 20:33
or upside down....



What is this snorkel you speak of???
I keep mine in the dive bag...but cant figure out how to use it with my FFM

Vercingetorix
01-18-2011, 21:58
...when you spit in your wetsuit and pee in your mask

Quero
01-18-2011, 22:32
I can tell you are a new diver when....


...you can't tell the difference between the right foot and the left foot of your dive fins.

Davetowz
01-18-2011, 22:57
...when you spit in your wetsuit and pee in your mask
Nah that's just an old graybeard thing...when u can't remember which way it goes!
or you had too much surface interval last night

Tassie Diver
01-19-2011, 05:09
... when you get concerned because you went to 18.1 metres / 61 ft and your open water instructor told you that all divers die when they do that!

jet126
01-19-2011, 07:33
The boat is a "1:30 Go" and you show up at 1:29. (And then need to rent gear)

Straegen
01-19-2011, 08:00
... when other divers cannot tell if they are a diver or they should hang another ornament on them

TwistedSister209
01-19-2011, 08:05
"...when everything has a bag or a box that it goes into/out of before going into/out of the dive bag
:smiley20: I still do that...sorta.

...forget to turn on their air.

Vercingetorix
01-19-2011, 08:30
...forget to turn on their air.

Happens to us all. Just as one of our scuba club members was about to jump in, he turned to me and asked me to turn on his air. He's a PADI instructor with thousands of dives.

Heck, one time, as I stepped of the dive boat in a giant stride, I noticed...no fins!!! Embarassing and only has to happen once to learn the lesson. Stepped off without a weight belt...once.

Straegen
01-19-2011, 09:03
Happens to us all. Just as one of our scuba club members was about to jump in, he turned to me and asked me to turn on his air. He's a PADI instructor with thousands of dives.

Heck, one time, as I stepped of the dive boat in a giant stride, I noticed...no fins!!! Embarassing and only has to happen once to learn the lesson. Stepped off without a weight belt...once.

I always take a hit of my reg looking at my SPG just before I hit the water. Makes sure there is air in the line and the line wasn't filled then closed. My OW teacher drilled that into our skulls.

jans
01-19-2011, 09:23
when you have such an adrenalin rush after the dive that you cant shut up long enough to take off your wetsuit..happens to me almost every dive.

chilly willy
01-19-2011, 09:35
What is this snorkel you speak of???

When they do a giant stride off the boat with a snorkel in their mouth instead of a reg.

DivingCRNA
01-19-2011, 10:06
When you don't sink because you are under weighted.

I used to be married to a diver that did this EVERY DIVE.

Gonnagettanked
01-19-2011, 10:56
When you don't sink because you are under weighted.

I used to be married to a diver that did this EVERY DIVE.

I don't remember being married to you!

jans
01-19-2011, 11:19
When you don't sink because you are under weighted.

I used to be married to a diver that did this EVERY DIVE.

Is this grounds for divorce in MO.?

scubadiver888
01-19-2011, 11:36
I can tell you are a new diver when...

... your hands move more than your feet.
... you forget to take the inserts out of your fins before putting them on.
... you don't tighten your tank strap enough and it falls out seconds after the strap gets wet.

bfmorgan
01-19-2011, 11:40
...when you spit in your wetsuit and pee in your mask
From personal experience, that happens at the age of 59:smiley19:

Davetowz
01-19-2011, 16:57
When you send PADI money every time you get a society membership mailing.

bennerman
01-19-2011, 17:34
When you send PADI money every time you get a society membership mailing.

Or when you don't send it to DAN?

Grizbear98
01-19-2011, 18:19
when you don't have your own wetsuit to pee in

FFDiver
01-19-2011, 18:31
When you dont know which way to turn the valve to open it...they forget the righty,tighty. lefty loosy lesson. left to live, right to die. People have died jumping off of boats without air being on and being weighted they become a sand dart.

scubadiver888
01-19-2011, 19:05
When you dont know which way to turn the valve to open it...they forget the righty,tighty. lefty loosy lesson. left to live, right to die. People have died jumping off of boats without air being on and being weighted they become a sand dart.

Hey, maybe we should start a "You know your a DM when..." thread. "You know your a DM when... you've turned on so many tanks you couldn't forget which way to turn it if you tried."

bennerman
01-19-2011, 19:09
When you dont know which way to turn the valve to open it...they forget the righty,tighty. lefty loosy lesson. left to live, right to die. People have died jumping off of boats without air being on and being weighted they become a sand dart.

I always make sure I can reach the valve. As well, the time it takes for me to get psyched up enough to jump gives me enough time to burn through and residual air

Davetowz
01-19-2011, 20:04
YouTube - Accident de plongée (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=KfofM_0Lw0w&feature=related)
nuff said.

Quero
01-19-2011, 20:21
YouTube - Accident de plongée (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=KfofM_0Lw0w&feature=related)
nuff said.That's funny (even though it was obviously staged).

tacofranklin
01-19-2011, 20:29
lolz, ka-fail :D

divingmedic
01-20-2011, 09:26
THATS the sign of a newbie, hands down! 1+ b'man!
I still wear my snorkel when diving. That was drilled into me by my instructor.

buddha0724
01-20-2011, 13:34
I still wear my snorkel when diving. That was drilled into me by my instructor.

Now i openly admit to being a newbie but everyone here including the instructors and DM's in this area wear snorkels.

bennerman
01-20-2011, 14:49
YouTube - Accident de plongée (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=KfofM_0Lw0w&feature=related)
nuff said.

YouTube - Scuba diver in panic - Panique d'un plongeur (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=_-KHIytrUVo&feature=related)

I agree with the comment, nice reflexes on the DM

Davetowz
01-20-2011, 19:59
Now i openly admit to being a newbie but everyone here including the instructors and DM's in this area wear snorkels.
I always where mine too. Where did I put the thing? I can't remember.