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divingmedic
07-07-2011, 12:31
I am stuck at the moment in Hillbilly Hell Oklahoma ( no it is not really a town but it seems like it should be.) Population 15, they have to count the cars that drive through to make a full set of teeth. I feel my IQ slipping each passing hour that I am here. Here for a family reunion on my wife's side. Have to sit for two days to listen to a bunch of 80's something year old talking about how they had to get up a 3 am to feed and milk the cows, plow the fields and harvest it before they walked 5 miles up hill in waist deep snow in the middle of summer ( while living in the flatest part of the state) to get to the one room school house that had the meanest teacher for miles around.

It is hitting 105 degrees every day that we are here. I made 300 meatballs before we came up here and now I have to make the sauce for it. No swimming pool for miles around ( not even a stock tank.)

But we drive right by Scuba Toys on the way here. Will be there later this month. I knew I should have filled and packed a rum runner and brought it me ( they are all teetotaler's.)

Diver Kat
07-07-2011, 13:33
OMG ... I needed a good laugh today! Thanks!!!!

Queen
07-07-2011, 14:24
I feel for you, I hit my limit with those sorts of gatherings after about a half hour. Thankfully I have very few relatives so those occurrences are infrequent at best.

fab50diver
07-07-2011, 14:37
Try to make the best of it. Some of those old timers are likely to have something in common with you (fishing, photography, etc) and they won't be around much longer. Ask them what they remember most about your wife when she was a child, or the funniest thing they remember her doing. It could get more entertaining and provide you with some much needed ammo when you stop at Scuba Toys to shop :-0

TwistedSister209
07-07-2011, 14:45
Medic--laughed very hard at your description. Like the town I used to live in eastern Oklahoma. My sanity was saved by frequent trips to Tulsa or OKC.
Sorry about no pool. Everything is always better with a splash.

Defman
07-07-2011, 14:46
a terrible sight for a sober man!!!

PTAaron
07-07-2011, 14:52
I think I've been to the sister city that seems to be located in Northern Michigan...
Definitely shoulda packed a "Save the Diver" kit with some booze ;)

divingmedic
07-07-2011, 14:57
OMG ... I needed a good laugh today! Thanks!!!!
Oh it gets better and better. We hit a deer when we were about a mile away from destination. Two bucks come bounding from the few tree along the road. My father in law is driving is his 40 foot long RV. He slows down for the two deer. Right then a young buck comes over the fence and we smack him, knocks part of the front end in and dents the hood.

Some found out I am making spaghetti and meatballs and asked to make sure I was using "Ragu" for the sauce. My grandmother one my mother's side came from Italy in 1901. I am using the old family recipe that takes hours of simmering, lots of fresh veggies and fresh tomato's. Not some jar sauce, I shudder at the thought of using jar sauce.

I am glad I can give ya a laugh. I will make a running commentary as it goes along. Thankfully my sister in law brought her wifi internet system. They do not have internet in the town.

TwistedSister209
07-07-2011, 15:01
Oh it gets better and better. We hit a deer when we were about a mile away from destination. Two bucks come bounding from the few tree along the road. My father in law is driving is his 40 foot long RV. He slows down for the two deer. Right then a young buck comes over the fence and we smack him, knocks part of the front end in and dents the hood.

Some found out I am making spaghetti and meatballs and asked to make sure I was using "Ragu" for the sauce. My grandmother one my mother's side came from Italy in 1901. I am using the old family recipe that takes hours of simmering, lots of fresh veggies and fresh tomato's. Not some jar sauce, I shudder at the thought of using jar sauce.

I am glad I can give ya a laugh. I will make a running commentary as it goes along. Thankfully my sister in law brought her wifi internet system. They do not have internet in the town.

Now I know you're in the hills.
When I ran a restaurant, I thought it would be a time to expand my culinary skills. Uh, no....meat & potatoes & fry the rest.
Will look forward to updates.

divingmedic
07-07-2011, 15:02
Medic--laughed very hard at your description. Like the town I used to live in eastern Oklahoma. My sanity was saved by frequent trips to Tulsa or OKC.
Sorry about no pool. Everything is always better with a splash.
I am in Western Oklahoma, not much difference. My grandparents lived at one time in a the big booming city of Ft Supply.

divingmedic
07-07-2011, 15:04
Try to make the best of it. Some of those old timers are likely to have something in common with you (fishing, photography, etc) and they won't be around much longer. Ask them what they remember most about your wife when she was a child, or the funniest thing they remember her doing. It could get more entertaining and provide you with some much needed ammo when you stop at Scuba Toys to shop :-0
Not meaning to diss the old ones, but in 17 years of marriage I have managed not to come to one of these. Sorry but as a child that was what our vacation was every summer, reunions. To see cousins that were 15 years older than or summer on my grandfather's farm or an uncles farm.

Diver Kat
07-07-2011, 15:14
Some found out I am making spaghetti and meatballs and asked to make sure I was using "Ragu" for the sauce. My grandmother one my mother's side came from Italy in 1901. I am using the old family recipe that takes hours of simmering, lots of fresh veggies and fresh tomato's. Not some jar sauce, I shudder at the thought of using jar sauce. Grew up in an Italian town - even mom, a non-Italian, made sauce from scratch and it sat simmering on the stove at least a couple days.

Sooooo .... did you make venison meatballs???:smiley36:

divingmedic
07-07-2011, 15:26
Grew up in an Italian town - even mom, a non-Italian, made sauce from scratch and it sat simmering on the stove at least a couple days.

Sooooo .... did you make venison meatballs???:smiley36:
Nope, I do and will not eat bambi meat. I know my grandmother has to be rolling in her grave. I will start about 6 am tomorrow making the sauce for 7pm dinner time. Meatballs made from ground beef, ground pork and ground veal.

Diver Kat
07-07-2011, 15:29
Nope, I do and will not eat bambi meat. I know my grandmother has to be rolling in her grave. I will start about 6 am tomorrow making the sauce for 7pm dinner time. Meatballs made from ground beef, ground pork and ground veal.
Good!!! I don't eat Bambi meat either .... Walt Disney would come back and haunt me!! Damn, I miss good Italian food ..... how long a drive is it to Hillbilly Hell???

scubajane
07-07-2011, 15:56
well you will be 80 eventually. will you give blow by blow descriptions of sauce making.....in 29 ft of snow in the dead of summer with rats swimming around your feet???? we can only hope you can still tell stories then...

divingmedic
07-07-2011, 16:58
well you will be 80 eventually. will you give blow by blow descriptions of sauce making.....in 29 ft of snow in the dead of summer with rats swimming around your feet???? we can only hope you can still tell stories then...

To each their own. I just do not like family reunions. My side of the family only lives 45 minutes from. I see them twice a year, which is about twice too much.

Diver Kat
07-07-2011, 17:04
I moved the first time 3000 miles from family, then moved back closer by a 1000 miles so they're all 2000 miles away. It's a blessing and a curse!

scubajane
07-07-2011, 17:09
8o( so sorry you don't like your family...

TwistedSister209
07-07-2011, 17:16
I always take an adult beverage when attending family functions. My husband won't go with me. Not sure that relates to me being twisted or our families.

scubagirlj
07-07-2011, 17:40
.....my condolences.....if you're ever up this way, i owe you a dive, or two....just because

Bert
07-07-2011, 20:47
Just don't get acused of lieing trough your tooth

SEMO Scuba
07-07-2011, 21:19
Deer meat spaghetti sauce! mmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmm sounds great to me.

Lulubelle
07-07-2011, 23:03
8o( so sorry you don't like your family...

Me too. I feel privileged to get to see my extended family every Thanksgiving, 70 of us last time around. My branch is amongst the "city folk". It is a pretty diverse lot, from nowhere, NC to NYC, from agnostic to the 5 ordained ministers who argue about Theology nonstop, from high school to Harvard/Princeton. I love them all, as they are. Especially the old ones. Open your mind and you might just learn a thing or two.


I always take an adult beverage when attending family functions. My husband won't go with me. Not sure that relates to me being twisted or our families.

Yes, well, that is not an option for us, the Southern Baptist contingent takes care of that. Never mind that my cousin, a regular Baptist minister, provided me with my first drink at 14. When my mother hosts T Day, she sneeks in some champagne for pre lunch mimosas, to the chagrin of many.

Any "persons of interest" which one brings to T Day are voted on, in a very open and public way, as to their worthiness of being in the family.

snagel
07-08-2011, 06:14
I got it figured out....here is what you do, start telling scuba stories. This will entertain you for hours and they will get tired of hearing them and quickly start avoiding you. It works everywheres else, why not in Hillbilly Hell!

Snagel

PTAaron
07-08-2011, 14:02
I got it figured out....here is what you do, start telling scuba stories. This will entertain you for hours and they will get tired of hearing them and quickly start avoiding you. It works everywheres else, why not in Hillbilly Hell!

Snagel
Excellent advice!

I used to find that talking about cadaver dissection that we did in gross anatomy class at family events got people to back off a bit... so maybe you could give that a try too.

divingmedic
07-09-2011, 08:41
Well found out late Thursday night the place we were supposed to use became unavailable. Seems as they thought we another branch of the family. My wife's grandmother and her sister married two brothers. They were also cousins. What type of cousins I am afraid to ask. Well they found a new place. They had to electric stoves with six elements on each stove. I thought I was in hog heaven. Well no....... only two burners on each stove worked. I ended up making my sauce in electric roaster ovens.

For those that feel should just love family reunions. Well if you do not like what I am posting just move along. I do not need to be flamed. I do not flame my fellow posters on here, so why do you feel the need to flame me?

TwistedSister209
07-09-2011, 08:55
Hey, medic--I love your stories because I did my time there and know what you're talking about.

If you get a chance--this trip or another--stop by Fort Reno--You can drive and look at the old buildings. The cottonwood trees alone are worth the 10 minute detour.

Oh, as you drive through Weatherford, give a shout out to my son.:smiley36: "Hey, Tim! Call your mother!" :smilie39:

scubagirlj
07-09-2011, 15:37
aw come on...tell us more!

Diver Kat
07-09-2011, 16:45
For those that feel should just love family reunions. Well if you do not like what I am posting just move along. I do not need to be flamed. I do not flame my fellow posters on here, so why do you feel the need to flame me?

As the unwitting member of a fully dysfunctional family, you'll get no flaming from me! The last family dinner I was at (20+ years ago) with all 5 siblings as well as both parents in attendance was because my daughter & I were stopping in NY to visit on the way home from a wedding in Ireland. (The DH's side of the family! Also dysfunctional, but that's a whole other story! :smiley36:) Mom & Dad sat at opposite ends of the table - not talking to each other. The brothers sat one at each end of the table next to a parent - not talking to each other. Made for a real interesting evening out at a restaurant! :smiley29:

chinacat46
07-09-2011, 16:52
Sorry didn't mean to flame you.

scubajane
07-09-2011, 18:46
no desire to flame....honest!!! just trying to understand and help make your time with them less painful.....
I remember my Aunt Helen quite well.... I think they spelled her name wrong......

Zeagle Eagle
07-09-2011, 22:55
I live in Willis TX. If you hit a deer here and don't stop right away by the time you get turned around it will be gone. Probably show up at the Road Kill Cafe for lunch tomorrow. We don't have a burger king or a Walmart and just got rid of my dial up for DSL.

scubajane
07-10-2011, 20:51
how did your sauce turn out??? can you mail me a sample?????

Beefcake
07-12-2011, 00:42
To each their own. I just do not like family reunions. My side of the family only lives 45 minutes from. I see them twice a year, which is about twice too much.
True Dat! Most of my family lives within 30-45 minutes of me, but my sister that lives in Alaska sees them more often than I do. Coming from a deeply religious family, I have found that a flask of Pendleton whiskey quickly breaks down barriers (I was amazed to see my prudish cousin and my mother snag my flask at my grandfather's funeral...). I love my family (one side anyway); does the fact that I'm too busy to talk to them more than twice a year make me a bad person? Life happens.

divingmedic
07-17-2011, 09:53
I live in Willis TX. If you hit a deer here and don't stop right away by the time you get turned around it will be gone. Probably show up at the Road Kill Cafe for lunch tomorrow. We don't have a burger king or a Walmart and just got rid of my dial up for DSL.

I worked EMS in up there in the late 90's. Willis and east county are scary.

divingmedic
07-17-2011, 09:55
no desire to flame....honest!!! just trying to understand and help make your time with them less painful.....
I remember my Aunt Helen quite well.... I think they spelled her name wrong......

Nothing can make that trip less painful. During 17 years of marrige this is the first one I got dragged to. My sauce was just ok. Since out of 12 electric burner only two worked I had to make my sauce in two roaster ovens. I had to ditch using veggies and whole tomatoes and had to use canned tomatoes and tomato paste. My grandmother is rolling over in her grave.

scubajane
07-17-2011, 10:56
Nothing can make that trip less painful. During 17 years of marrige this is the first one I got dragged to. My sauce was just ok. Since out of 12 electric burner only two worked I had to make my sauce in two roaster ovens. I had to ditch using veggies and whole tomatoes and had to use canned tomatoes and tomato paste. My grandmother is rolling over in her grave.
come see me!~!!! make sauce!!!!! stove at the church has 8 working gas burners!!!! make lots of sauce!!!!!!

navyhmc
07-18-2011, 00:45
Yeah, we have areas up here in Doo-Dah that you can't hear yourself think 'cause of all the banjos picking.

cgvmer
07-18-2011, 20:33
Well I'm not exactly living in a hillbilly zone (15 miles due west of NYC), but we have an annual family picinic. It started 35 years ago to celebrate my grandmother's birthday. She had 10 kids (+2 that didn't make a year) of which my mom is one. When she passed away, we continued the event. There are 37 1st cousins all on my mom's side, it has gone from me being one of the kids, to my first cousins showing up with their grand kids. The group fluctuates from a small group of 30 to big years more than 100 show up. We have rented the same park pavilion all these years, alcohol is allowed, their is no expectation other than to come and sit around BSing with family.

I have met 2nd cousins from all parts of the country, and a few now make the pilgrimage every year.