PDA

View Full Version : My Male Roommate



scubasavvy
10-02-2007, 14:56
I need a man's point of view on this. Is my roommate just an idiot or a typical male? I'm going to go with an idiot. Here's the story:

He started being way too nice to me, which led all of us (visitors included) here at my Beacon Hill residence to believe that he was interested in me. We later got into a conversation about relationships, where I told him that I was single and it was going to stay that way. If that doesn't scream "I'm not interested," I don't know what does.

So one night before going out to dinner with some friends, he started texting me so that no one could hear what he was saying. Anyway the text read something like this: "Your rear end looks amazing in those jeans." At this point in time I verbally replied with "You're a perv." Bad idea. He thought I was joking for some reason, so he sent a text back that read: "I'm not trying to be a perv, your rear looks amazing in those jeans." Ok? So in my book, or anyone else's book that isn't a sexual predator, he's a pervert. Nicely I texted him back and told him that I wasn't interested and it wasn't going to happen...ever.

His innuendos were then directed toward our friends or any other female visitor that came to the apartment. My other roommate was planning on inviting a very shy friend over for the evening, but she called and canceled the plans for obvious reasons.

As time went on, we started putting the pieces of our apartment together, which included the printer. He had asked me to install the drivers and software on his laptop so that he could use it and not bother anyone else. Well, when I installed the printer, one of the programs that installed was a picture manager, which popped up with his entire photo collection. Low and behold in his "picture collection" (I'm keeping it G rated here for the kids on the site) was a picture of me that he took off Facebook. At this point, I was alarmed. Now I have a stalker.

I confronted him and told him that if he ever made another sexual innuendo to myself or any of my friends, comment about how I looked amazing in anything, or if I found any other freaky nonsense that he shouldn't have I'd have him arrested and reported to the university. Needless to say, all of that has stopped, but he now interrogates my other roommate about me, who I've been with and how it's gone. The other night was pretty interesting. He had asked her why I didn't want a relationship with anyone, not with him specifically (yeah, I'm sure), and he didn't want to ask me straight up (but I told him at least 15 times before why) because I get very defensive.

What do you guys think? I can't get rid of him because he's $1120 of my rent in the middle of the year...

I'm going to make a man law right here: If someone says they're not interested...they're not interested.

ccarter
10-02-2007, 15:03
There's just unstable/obsessive people randomly scattered around the world that are both male and female.. not sure that's really a "need help with a guy" issue.. more of a "need help with a crazy person" issue..

:smilie40:

jo8243
10-02-2007, 15:07
You never explicity say it, but I'm assuming you are female. Why do you have a male roomate? Asking for trouble......

Vercingetorix
10-02-2007, 15:07
Can you find another room-mate? Or another apartment? You've obviously already explored these options. If it gets worse, you may consider criminal complaint or a court order.

Another angle, is that he may think you're playing hard-to-get. How polite are you when you decline? Don't be; it may require rudeness.

He may think that you can't get rid of him because you are financially dependent on him, which you are.

And I,too,had the same question as jo8243. Your profle indicates" No Gender Specified"

scubasavvy
10-02-2007, 15:08
There's just unstable/obsessive people randomly scattered around the world that are both male and female.. not sure that's really a "need help with a guy" issue.. more of a "need help with a crazy person" issue..

:smilie40:

You've got crazy right. Not to be sexist or anything, I mean I'm a woman, but I find that we're usually the unstable/obsessive ones. I think he's just a creep.

scubasavvy
10-02-2007, 15:10
You never explicity say it, but I'm assuming you are female. Why do you have a male roomate? Asking for trouble......

I think it's easier to live with a guy. They're so much more relaxed than another girl would have been. I moved in with my best friend from high school and when we met this guy (from off campus housing none the less) we discussed how we were going to do our own thing and he was going to do his. He's older and has other friends. He won't be living with us next year though, that's for sure.

scubasavvy
10-02-2007, 15:11
lol, so many questions...yes I'm female and yes I was completely rude every time he made comments.

jo8243
10-02-2007, 15:13
You've got crazy right. Not to be sexist or anything, I mean I'm a woman, but I find that we're usually the unstable/obsessive ones. I think he's just a creep.

I'm a man and I'm here to tell you... all men are pigs. Any man who says they are not is lying. Men and women were not meant to be platonic roomates. Get rid of him.

ccarter
10-02-2007, 15:16
You've got crazy right. Not to be sexist or anything, I mean I'm a woman, but I find that we're usually the unstable/obsessive ones. I think he's just a creep.

I'm a girlie man and I'm here to tell you... all men are pigs. Any man who says they are not is lying. Men and women were not meant to be platonic roomates. Get rid of him.Word.

Also.. personally.. (and i know the above poster is too (my brother)) I'm insanely messy.. most other males I know are too with the exception of a few really anal people that have everything waaayy to neat. Although most females I know/have met are clean freaks.. wouldn't think a girl would choose to have a guy as a roomate based soley on that..

scubasavvy
10-02-2007, 15:18
You can be a pig and understand that no means no...that's all I ask...but he's leaving as soon as the lease is up. I'm kind of stuck between a rock and hard place until that happens. The lease specifically reads if one of the roomies bails out, the other two are responsible for the rent. So I'd have to come up with another $1120 a month...

jo8243
10-02-2007, 15:24
You can be a pig and understand that no means no...that's all I ask...but he's leaving as soon as the lease is up. I'm kind of stuck between a rock and hard place until that happens. The lease specifically reads if one of the roomies bails out, the other two are responsible for the rent. So I'd have to come up with another $1120 a month...

Well based on your earlier posts he's obviously obsessed with you... so...

The real question is.... what do you like less..... 1) paying an extra $1120 a month or 2) having him going through your underwear drawer when you're not there.

Maybe you need a lock on your door if you don't already have one.

:smiley36:

ccarter
10-02-2007, 15:32
You can be a pig and understand that no means no...that's all I ask...but he's leaving as soon as the lease is up. I'm kind of stuck between a rock and hard place until that happens. The lease specifically reads if one of the roomies bails out, the other two are responsible for the rent. So I'd have to come up with another $1120 a month...

Well based on your earlier posts he's obviously obsessed with you... so...

The real question is.... what do you like less..... 1) paying an extra $1120 a month or 2) having him going through your underwear drawer when you're not there.

Maybe you need a lock on your door if you don't already have one.

:smiley36:
Deadbolt + Chain as well.

I went the roommate route once.. never again. Not that I had a similar experience; I just didn't like sharing my space! Plus my hobbies.. wet scuba gear.. dirty muddy mountain bike.. tend to not be "kosher" with normal people.

jo8243
10-02-2007, 15:34
Also.. personally.. (and i know the above poster is too (my brother)) I'm insanely messy..

I like how you left your scuba gear strown on the floor in the hall for like 2 weeks after we went diving. slob. If I did that my wife would be like: :devil+push:

comet24
10-02-2007, 15:41
The part that worries me the must about this guy is how after you told him no he goes and asks your friends about other guys you go out with. This throws up a few red flags. He has some problems. Now the only question is how for will he go.

Does he seem interested in any other girls. This is college so a normal guy would move on and find another girl but we have already established hes not normal.

You eluded to the fact that he's older are we talking a year or two or something more. Have you met any of his ex's. I would have a few questions for them. Starting with how did the break up go. Who's idea was it.

ScubaGir1
10-02-2007, 15:41
Also.. personally.. (and i know the above poster is too (my brother)) I'm insanely messy..

I like how you left your scuba gear strown on the floor in the hall for like 2 weeks after we went diving. slob. If I did that my wife would be like: :devil+push:
LOL, that's how I am with my bf's stuff all over the place! I'm seriously re-thinking this whole live with a guy thing. I don't like living with girls either LOL. They are WAY worse than living with a guy :smiley5: If I had to chose...I'd probably live with my dogs, chinchilla and scuba gear :smiley36: And then the bf can visit :smiley2:


All I can say is get a lock on your door. If you're really paranoid that he's going through your stuff, set up a webcam connected to your computer. Let it run and record your room (just keep the monitor off so he can't see its on). :smiley17:

ccarter
10-02-2007, 15:41
Also.. personally.. (and i know the above poster is too (my brother)) I'm insanely messy..

I like how you left your scuba gear strown on the floor in the hall for like 2 weeks after we went diving. slob. If I did that my wife would be like: :devil+push:
Perfectly acceptable location for temporary storage.. I had to use the crate I normally keep it in for something else.

It's also worth noting.. I had just ridden a bike for 12 hours when you saw it/told me i should move it.. not like I'm in the mood to clean and move and pickup after that. Just sleepy time.

mike_s
10-02-2007, 16:37
I need a man's point of view on this. Is my roommate just an idiot or a typical male? I'm going to go with an idiot. Here's the story:

He started being way too nice to me, which led all of us (visitors included) here at my Beacon Hill residence to believe that he was interested in me. We later got into a conversation about relationships, where I told him that I was single and it was going to stay that way. If that doesn't scream "I'm not interested," I don't know what does.

So one night before going out to dinner with some friends, he started texting me so that no one could hear what he was saying. Anyway the text read something like this: "Your rear end looks amazing in those jeans." At this point in time I verbally replied with "You're a perv." Bad idea. He thought I was joking for some reason, so he sent a text back that read: "I'm not trying to be a perv, your rear looks amazing in those jeans." Ok? So in my book, or anyone else's book that isn't a sexual predator, he's a pervert. Nicely I texted him back and told him that I wasn't interested and it wasn't going to happen...ever.

His innuendos were then directed toward our friends or any other female visitor that came to the apartment. My other roommate was planning on inviting a very shy friend over for the evening, but she called and canceled the plans for obvious reasons.

As time went on, we started putting the pieces of our apartment together, which included the printer. He had asked me to install the drivers and software on his laptop so that he could use it and not bother anyone else. Well, when I installed the printer, one of the programs that installed was a picture manager, which popped up with his entire photo collection. Low and behold in his "picture collection" (I'm keeping it G rated here for the kids on the site) was a picture of me that he took off Facebook. At this point, I was alarmed. Now I have a stalker.

I confronted him and told him that if he ever made another sexual innuendo to myself or any of my friends, comment about how I looked amazing in anything, or if I found any other freaky nonsense that he shouldn't have I'd have him arrested and reported to the university. Needless to say, all of that has stopped, but he now interrogates my other roommate about me, who I've been with and how it's gone. The other night was pretty interesting. He had asked her why I didn't want a relationship with anyone, not with him specifically (yeah, I'm sure), and he didn't want to ask me straight up (but I told him at least 15 times before why) because I get very defensive.

What do you guys think? I can't get rid of him because he's $1120 of my rent in the middle of the year...

I'm going to make a man law right here: If someone says they're not interested...they're not interested.


I had a friend who had something similar happened....

The university moved them because of it.

When you talk to the university, remind them of their liability of placing someone with you who might sexually assault you and remind them of sexual harrasment laws and how they are allowing that.

GDiver
10-02-2007, 17:22
You've got crazy right. Not to be sexist or anything, I mean I'm a woman, but I find that we're usually the unstable/obsessive ones. I think he's just a creep.

I'm a man and I'm here to tell you... all men are pigs. Any man who says they are not is lying. Men and women were not meant to be platonic roomates. Get rid of him.

I really have to agree here. Even when a man has been a female's friend for years, the sex thing is always on his mind. "We" just tend to hide it more if we really want to have "just" a friendship.

dallasdivergirl
10-02-2007, 17:29
I think you need to be careful about this guy. He sounds like he is a little unstable and a creep. I (unfortunately) have past experience with having dated an obsessed guy, I had to basically go "underground" to have him leave me alone. I moved & had nothing in my name, my parents had untilites, an apartment and an extra cell phone in their name. It was pretty difficult to get him out of my life. Is this a campus residence? If it is then speak with them about it. I went to an acedemic advisor to get him removed from our residence (it was boy/girl floors).

thor
10-02-2007, 17:46
1) Get him out NOW. CHANGE THE LOCKS. He is probably looking in your underwear drawer right now. I would not want this guy to know where I live, much less have a key to my house. If you have any doubts, watch Silence of the Lambs with him and see if he is takes notes during the movie


I'm going to make a man law right here: If someone says they're not interested...they're not interested.
2) Sorry, women can't right MAN-laws. That is why they are called Man Laws.


"Your rear end looks amazing in those jeans." .


3) Just for the record, most men reading your post were wondering, .. hmmm. I wonder just how amazing her rear end looked in those jeans. Nonetheless, this guy needs to go and very soon.

Tableleg
10-02-2007, 20:05
When you talk to the university, remind them of their liability of placing someone with you who might sexually assault you and remind them of sexual harrasment laws and how they are allowing that.
+1 If it was the university who put this creep into your living space (is this a dorm, an apartment? What's the deal with the crazy-high rent every month?!?!) then they have to deal with situations like this. They'll either move him out or give you the option of moving out. This sounds like your best bet.


Just for the record, most men reading your post were wondering, .. hmmm. I wonder just how amazing her rear end looked in those jeans. Nonetheless, this guy needs to go and very soon. LOL... I'm glad I wasn't the only one... :smiley36:


I'm a man and I'm here to tell you... all men are pigs. I can't be lying if I don't think I am from my point of view. I'm just taking from this comment that you have daughters/sisters. :smiley17:

ccarter
10-02-2007, 20:14
+1 If he was the university who put this creep into your living space..Yeah I was wondering that myself..


(is this a dorm, an apartment? What's the deal with the crazy-high rent every month?!?!)I thought that when I read it but didn't post it.. my rent in college was like $485/month (my 1/3 of it at least) and it was a pretty nice place and that included utilities..

Do you carry mace or anything? Blackbelt? Handgun? Tire-iron? Aluminum 80 tank?

Steve Scuba
10-02-2007, 20:36
Was it "When Harry Met Sally" that said that men can't have women friends without wanting to sleep with them?

I agree with just about every other post here. It doesn't matter it your roommate is a man or a woman, if they creep you out, ditch them.

Oh! I found the quote from the movie (great movie btw, for you younger adults who may not have seen it):

Harry Burns (http://www.imdb.com/name/nm0000345/): No, what I'm saying is they all WANT to have sex with you.
Sally Albright (http://www.imdb.com/name/nm0000212/): They do not.
Harry Burns (http://www.imdb.com/name/nm0000345/): Do too.
Sally Albright (http://www.imdb.com/name/nm0000212/): They do not.
Harry Burns (http://www.imdb.com/name/nm0000345/): Do too.
Sally Albright (http://www.imdb.com/name/nm0000212/): How do you know?
Harry Burns (http://www.imdb.com/name/nm0000345/): Because no man can be friends with a woman that he finds attractive. He always wants to have sex with her.
Sally Albright (http://www.imdb.com/name/nm0000212/): So, you're saying that a man can be friends with a woman he finds unattractive?
Harry Burns (http://www.imdb.com/name/nm0000345/): No. You pretty much want to nail 'em too.

Actually, I just realized that this movie is 18 years old. Ouch, that really hurts.

Venio
10-02-2007, 21:00
Was it "When Harry Met Sally" that said that men can't have women friends without wanting to sleep with them?

I agree with just about every other post here. It doesn't matter it your roommate is a man or a woman, if they creep you out, ditch them.

Oh! I found the quote from the movie (great movie btw, for you younger adults who may not have seen it):

Harry Burns (http://www.imdb.com/name/nm0000345/): No, what I'm saying is they all WANT to have sex with you.
Sally Albright (http://www.imdb.com/name/nm0000212/): They do not.
Harry Burns (http://www.imdb.com/name/nm0000345/): Do too.
Sally Albright (http://www.imdb.com/name/nm0000212/): They do not.
Harry Burns (http://www.imdb.com/name/nm0000345/): Do too.
Sally Albright (http://www.imdb.com/name/nm0000212/): How do you know?
Harry Burns (http://www.imdb.com/name/nm0000345/): Because no man can be friends with a woman that he finds attractive. He always wants to have sex with her.
Sally Albright (http://www.imdb.com/name/nm0000212/): So, you're saying that a man can be friends with a woman he finds unattractive?
Harry Burns (http://www.imdb.com/name/nm0000345/): No. You pretty much want to nail 'em too.

Actually, I just realized that this movie is 18 years old. Ouch, that really hurts.

Love the movie! I was thinking about the very same scene a little bit earlier when I was reading through this thread.

Diverdude
10-03-2007, 10:42
I certainly would not trust this guy in your apartment. And, I would start looking for hidden cameras as well as getting locks for your stuff. I think it was foolish to room with a guy you dont even know, but thats in the past. I would kick him out or find a new place.

shadragon
10-03-2007, 11:46
The lease specifically reads if one of the roomies bails out, the other two are responsible for the rent. So I'd have to come up with another $1120 a month...
Sit down with him and have a friendly chat. Let him know you like him as a freind, but you have no interest in him beyond being his roomie. Let him know his messages are making you uncomfortable and you want him to stop. If he doesn't, then block him on your cell.

Women are very subtle at times and even when they think they have the message delivered it sails under our radar. Guys can be oblivious sometimes. You just have to keep him at arms length until he moves out normally.

TxScubaBear
10-03-2007, 12:23
Do you carry mace or anything? Blackbelt? Handgun? Tire-iron? Aluminum 80 tank?


.40 caliber???

jo8243
10-03-2007, 12:45
3) Just for the record, most men reading your post were wondering, .. hmmm. I wonder just how amazing her rear end looked in those jeans.

Agreed. This thread needs pics.
:icon_biggrin:

georoc01
10-03-2007, 13:13
Ok..I am going to add something as guys we have to deal with...

A survey was done about ladies being pursued. At what point is the difference between pursued and being stalked?

The difference is how attractive the man in question is.

One of the challenges in college is dealing with roommates, You have some good advice here. Motorola sells a really inexpensive security system that works through your computer, with wireless cameras and such. And make sure your computer is locked down as well.

Tableleg
10-03-2007, 13:34
Do you carry mace or anything? Blackbelt? Handgun? Tire-iron? Aluminum 80 tank?


.40 caliber??? I've got one of those, but someday I think I might need to use it. I kinda like the AL 80 option; people wouldn't mess with the guy carrying around a scuba tank. I think this is what I'm going to start doing... :smilie39:

BuzzF117
10-03-2007, 14:21
Just tell him your gay and that you prefer really butch women and be done with it....

im just kidding this sounds like this guy is pretty immature and you should have some of your guy friends have a talk with him wink wink if you get my drift.

Storm
10-03-2007, 15:27
Not all men are pigs, sloppy, think with their groin, and are incapable of carrying on a platonic relationship with members of the opposite sex. To insist so is to perpetuate the myth.

The ironic thing is, the vast majority of those boys who do behave that way do so because they think they're supposed to behave that way, after all, according to TV, movies, and many women's opinions, that type of behavior is to be expected, tolerated, and in some rare cases in even considered endearing; like a cute pet that needs to be house broken.

The fact is most men are not well represented by this type of stereotyping (although I must admit that it makes for good fodder for comedians and sit-coms) and despite the fact that we as a gender do enjoy poking fun at ourselves we are to some degree are perpetuating the myth.

I apologize if I seem a bit stuffy, but I personally do not resemble in looks, actions, maturity and mentality, Homer, Tim the tool man, nor any of the modern day TV representations of the married, or otherwise, male gender. Neither am I the all knowing, always perfect Mr. Cleaver of the fifties stereotype. Like most men, I fall somewhere in the middle of the road and often times find myself shaking my head at the sheer foolishness of my brothers who think its our role to play the straight man in some comedy duo.

Anyway, back to the OP's dilemma;

My advice...
As soon as you can get him out of your home do so. See if you can find a replacement roomie. This guy sounds a bit too out there.

here endeth the rant.

greyzen
10-03-2007, 15:41
Yeah, I'm with Storm.

I've had lots of friends with whom lots of guys wanted to become intimate with, and I frankly wouldn't have even dreamed about it... I have had lots of female friends and most of them were as platonic as my male coworkers.

The guy who is interested in you really doesn't sound all that horrible, just socially inept, honestly.

you found a facebook picture of you on the computer... On my computer, all pictures regardless of type/genre/etc. all go into one directory. And my photoviewer looks there and displays them for me.

he's made some inappropriate advances, well that isn't tolerable I would get on his bad side quickly. Explain that you aren't into him and that you don't feel comfortable with his advances and compliments. Don't treat the guy like a date rapists just because he's coming on strong. A lot of guys don't KNOW how to compliment girls without being creepy...

And if he is honestly, without the cheering squad egging you on, making you feel uncomfortable. Do something about it, move out or move him out.

JCAT
10-03-2007, 15:48
storm wrote

but I personally do not resemble in looks, actions, maturity and mentality, Homer, Tim the tool man, nor any of the modern day TV representations of the married, or otherwise, male gender. Neither am I the all knowing, always perfect Mr. Cleaver of the fifties stereotype. Like most men, I fall somewhere in the middle of the road and often times find myself shaking my head at the sheer foolishness of my brothers who think its our role to play the straight man in some comedy duo.

Well stated!! :smiley32:

cyclone
10-07-2007, 06:02
I smell fishy around here.:smiley11: I have watched a couple of these at dateline msnbc. In the Philippines where I came from your looking for trouble if it happen you say that to another male.

Suther2136
10-07-2007, 08:55
You've got crazy right. Not to be sexist or anything, I mean I'm a woman, but I find that we're usually the unstable/obsessive ones. I think he's just a creep.

I'm a man and I'm here to tell you... all men are pigs. Any man who says they are not is lying. Men and women were not meant to be platonic roomates. Get rid of him.

I agree with Scubasavvy. Men are pigs. I gave my daughter 5 rules to live by when she went to college:
1) Men are pigs
2) Study hard learn a lot
3) Men are pigs
4) Meet lots of people and form great friendships
and finally 5) Men are pigs

I forget the movie but the following line sums up the problems you are having.

Female: "I wouldn't sleep with you unless you were the last man on earth!"

Male: "So... you're saying I got a chance?"

Dump the roomie.

Geekybiker
10-09-2007, 14:04
Well, I dont think he's that abnormal. I remember how much of a horn-ball I was back in college. He's probably a bit on the dense side, but that isnt unusual either. Women tend to be too subtle about telling men off. Especially men who dont want to take the hint.

Either way its an uncomfortable situation. Even if he does stop I doubt you'll feel safe. You might look into seeing if there is another room you can arrange a swap/sublease with and get out now.

Doghouse
10-09-2007, 15:27
Tell him NO firmly one more time, then taze him in the crotch.

liuk3
10-09-2007, 16:55
I forget the movie but the following line sums up the problems you are having.

Female: "I wouldn't sleep with you unless you were the last man on earth!"

Male: "So... you're saying I got a chance?"

Dump the roomie.

Movie was "Dumb and Dumber" and that was one of the best scenes!

Kind of off-topic, but I just assumed the original poster was a dude, so it was really freaky in reading the original post. LOL!

MSilvia
10-10-2007, 12:06
Women tend to be too subtle about telling men off. Especially men who dont want to take the hint.
Yeah, I can see that. If he's really convinced himself he has a chance, then he could very easily be overcome with a case of selective hearing.

When you say "I'm not interested in dating anyone right now", he might be hearing "You won't have any competition for a while".

Formerly 45yroldNewbie
10-10-2007, 13:47
I had to go through and re-read the whole thread a couple times; it sounds like there are three of you splitting the apartment? Is the other roomie a female too? Does she feel uncomfortable around this guy? In the end you will be the one to make the judgment call, but I agree with some of the posters here, sometimes we just can't take no for an answer until it hits us upside the head. Based on what I gather though this guy seems to be a little more persistent than what most college guys would be! I also agree that you may want to get a deadbolt lock for your bedroom door and use it not only when you are gone but while in your room for the night as well.

I would guess he is probably harmless but dumb, however, you don't want to base your safety and security on everyone else's "guess"! So like I said you will have to make the final call on this guy he is either ignorant or a stalker, which side of the fence do you think he is on?

mitsuguy
10-10-2007, 15:50
I don't have a whole lot of advice for ya other than what these guys have already given ya...

however...

I was ****ting myself for the whole first page until I realized the OP was female (I knew that from other posts, but for some reason it just didn't click)

thor
10-10-2007, 17:35
I don't have a whole lot of advice for ya other than what these guys have already given ya...

however...

I was ****ting myself for the whole first page until I realized the OP was female (I knew that from other posts, but for some reason it just didn't click)



Not that there is anything wrong with that

scubasavvy
10-12-2007, 10:47
Tell him NO firmly one more time, then taze him in the crotch.

Lol...I'm going to strangle him with my extra cam band in the middle of the night. I don't how much you have to tell someone something. I threatened him with a law suit, her persistence (and ignorance) really cracks me up...and creeps me out. He's out after this year, no questions.

And my good old Dad is coming up this weekend to have a chat with him. If that doesn't scare him, I don't know what will.

subsur
10-12-2007, 18:54
well, there is nothing wrong with your picture on his computer. facebook is kinda public, i mean anyone can get your picture. he was interested in you and could not get your message straight. he either attributed it to you not being serious or possibly a bit buzzed (in a loud bar) or simply was so self-centered that he could not believe that you were not iinterested in him. after your other comments he still thought that you're joking. my thoughts are - he is definitely obsessive. what he exhibited is probably not that uncommon considering you are living in the same apartment and there is room for all sorts of interactions. we don't know enough about him to judge whether he is a pervert or dangerous. but i'd change a roomate if i were you. i live in cambridge, and it's possible to get apartments, there are thousands of students.

frankc420
10-12-2007, 19:45
So when women buy tight sexy jeans that they want to look... tight and sexy in, when a guy makes a comment on how nice their butt looks, they are considered a perv? Hmm.. interesting!

Formerly 45yroldNewbie
10-13-2007, 14:58
So when women buy tight sexy jeans that they want to look... tight and sexy in, when a guy makes a comment on how nice their butt looks, they are considered a perv? Hmm.. interesting!

No but when the guy has been told no, and has been told no again, and continues to pursue her and act like there is a chance, and even acts like they are an item or becomes possessive, there is plenty of room for lots of red flags.