How can I complain quietly?

[cudachaser]

Got this banner asking why I haven't posted...I was insulted by a member...but rather not air the dirty laundry

[NitroWill]

Send a PM to Larry if you feel it needs to be addressed http://forum.scubatoys.com/members/scubatoys-larry.html

Hope you don't let one member spoil this nice member and stay with us!

[Puffer Fish]

Originally Posted by cudachaser

Got this banner asking why I haven't posted...I was insulted by a member...but rather not air the dirty laundry

I hope that you have said something to the member....via pm. Sometimes people do things without realizing the impact. Well, I hope that is what happened.

Sadly, in a cases like this, the good people leave and the not so good stay... thanks for at least starting this thread.

[DollFin]

I might be new here, but I've been on lots of different message boards and personality conflicts are as much a fact of life on line as they are in the real world. More-so in some ways, as emotion and intent does not translate very well through a typed message. I've seen many cases (and even been involved in a few on both sides of the coin) where something was said that was not meant to be hurtful, and in fact may even have been meant to be a light-hearted affectionate comment, but ended up unintentionally hurting someone's feelings. Unfortunately, the other extreme can also be the case as anonymity can make people think they have license to say deliberately hurtful things they would never say in the real world. Whatever the case, your not wanting to air anyone's dirty laundry here on the board says something good about you and I hope won't let one conflict keep you away. I don't know if a polite PM to the person in question letting them know why what they said hurt you would help or not, but it's something to consider. From the few weeks I've been here so far, the good does seem to by-far outweigh the bad.

[CompuDude]

Originally Posted by cudachaser

Got this banner asking why I haven't posted...I was insulted by a member...but rather not air the dirty laundry

If it's something you feel should be brought to the management's attention, use the "Report Post" function by clicking the little triangle icon (with the exclamation point) in the lower left corner of the offending post. It will send a message directly (and discretely) to the head honchos to review.

The "Why haven't you posted?" banner is an automatic function of the board. Anyone who has not posted in x days gets it, depending on the settings chosen by the administrator.

At least, that's how it is on other boards. Oddly, I've never seen one on this board.

[Zenagirl]

Hey Cuda, don't let one person's careless post drive you away! Definitely either PM them or Larry and make sure your feelings are known.

If it was me, I'm soooo sorry and won't do it again.

[fireflock]

Is it that big a deal if someone you don't know and has never met you wrote something that you found offensive?

I'm just curious. I'm all for civility in public discourse; there's no excuse for being rude. At the same time, almost everyone reading understands that message board insults say more about the person doing the insulting than the person who was insulted.

[FOUNDATIONER]

That's a quote from some movie, I can't remember which.
But here is good advice from the bible:

II Corinthians 11:19 For ye suffer fools gladly, seeing ye yourselves are wise.

(I don't thump the bible, but I do read it from time to time)

[mwhities]

Feel free to PM me as well.

[LCFrigon]

I am dumb....I read this post thinking someone was offended by receiving the banner or why haven't you posted Wasn't till I got down to the post that said that was an automatic send by the site before i realized that the insult was something else. Couldn't for the life of me figure out what was so insulting over asking why someone hadn't posted Like I said..I'm dumb