Non-offensive jokes... (really)

[scubastud]

Teacher asked student how many letters in the alphabet.
Kid replies... "eighteen"
"Eighteen!.. no that isnt right"
Kid says "Uhhuh... ET left in a UFO and the CIA went after him."

Woman asks her doctor..." I am two months pregnant... when will the baby move?"
Doctor replies "With any luck, as soon as he is eighteen years old."

Why did the blonde steal a police car?
She saw 9-11 on the back, and thought it was a Porsche.

[bennerman]

What do you call a blonde who has been dead in closet for 2 decades?

Answer: Hide and go seek champion of 1989

[julz]

what's red and green and goes a hundred mile an hour
answer: a frog in a blender

[Black-Gorrilla]

Originally Posted by bennerman

What do you call a blonde who has been dead in closet for 2 decades?

Answer: Hide and go seek champion of 1989

I'm actually laughing out loud to this one... at 1 30 am

[bdbrown4764]

Why did the blond jump over the cyclone fence?

To see what was on the other side.

[scubastud]

ummm ok... I guess maybe it could possibly be a little offensive to blondes.

[John Yaskowich]

A blond was filling out a form. The person beside her noticed that when she got the box for "Name" she paused, waved her finger, tapped her foot and nodded her head, then filled in her name. He asked her the reason for this and she said "I was singing 'Happy Birthday' and needed to wait for the song to finish to remember my name."

[julz]

what do you call a smart blond
a golden retriever

[mm_dm]

RIVER WALK
There's this blonde out for a walk. She comes to a river and sees another blonde on the opposite bank. "Yoo-hoo!" she shouts, "How can I get to the other side?"
The second blonde looks up the river then down the river and shouts back, "You ARE on the other side."

[baywatch106]

Where does dragon milk come from? A cow with short legs.