CONTEST: How Might Scuba Diving Achieve Peace in The Middle East?

[Vercingetorix]

This is the first of several contests that I may sponsor in the future on the ScubaToys forum.

Criteria:
We are all aware of the attempt by Miss South Carolina to answer a question during a beauty contest. She didn't do so well. Whether or not you are sympathetic to her plight of being under pressure is irrelevant. The results were rambling, incoherent, blathering.

Your job is to answer a question in the same manner. Do not replicate her answer; give us your own words. Be humorous. Or serious. Or whatever trips your trigger.

The Question: How can scuba diving help us achieve peace in the Middle East?

The prize: $5 added to your ScubaToys account by me

Rules:
1. The top five entries (selected by me based upon my own biased and jaundiced criteria) will be reposted in a new thread with a poll attached.

2. These top five entries will then be voted on by you, the denizens of the ScubaToys forum.

3. The top vote-getter of this second round will be notified in the thread and by PM. I will PM Larry as well.

4. The winner will then PM Larry with his/her real name so that Larry can add the prize amount to the winner's account. So as to preserve the winner's anonimity, I will NOT know the real name of the winner.

5. The initial duration to post entries will be one calendar week or longer or shorter, (or whatever I bloody well decide).

6. The duration to vote on entries will be one calendar week or...

7. If the top two or three entries' vote counts are close (again, my criteria), we'll re-vote on those top two or three entries.

8. This contest may be cancelled at any time for any reason by me or Larry or Joe.

9. Entries submitted by contestants may be edited or deleted if their content is deemed inappropriate, obscene, sexist, racist, or just too gross. Entrants are solely responsible for the contents of their entry; the contest sponsor, the owners of ScubaToys or its employees are not responsible for contents of any entry.

If you see an entry in the thread that you like, let that submitter know in the thread as well. If the submitter doesn't win, public praise is a warm and fuzzy we all appreciate.

Depending upon the complexity of future contests, prize amount may vary. If you wish to chip in to help increase the prize amount, let me know. If you have a contest idea, let me know; especially, if you're willing to help fund it.

So why am I doing this? Pay It Forward.

Semi-Legal stuff: This contest is privately sponsored and funded by Richard Emery. It is not associated with ScubaToys, its owners, nor any ScubaToys employees. The opinions, rules, contents (other than entries submitted by contestants), and results are solely the responsibility of the sponsor. Bottom line: if you don't like this, don't bug Larry; it's not his fault.

[cummings66]

Scuba Diving can bring peace to the Middle East by allowing all those who disagree with our humanitarian goals to experience a new type of peace which will occur by seeing the wonders below the surface. The really bad divers might get AGE which will render them incapable of shooting guns, proper training will assure this occurs to the proper individuals. If they can still pull the trigger on their assault rifle at the beach we could immediately attempt an in water decompression dive by placing them on 100% O2 at 50 feet and slowly bring them back up, for safety reasons this needs to take at least 6 hours and we'd want to give them the standard AL19 tank because we don't want to hurt them in their weakened state by carrying something heavy.

I believe scuba has a lot of potential here.

[Vercingetorix]

That's the kind of insightful analysis we're looking for, cummings

[creggur]

I believe SCUBA diving could bring peace to the Middle East because it will get people wet. I believe the people over there are always in a bad mood because they are so hot, I mean it's just a big desert, and you know how you are always in a bad mood when it's hot right? So if everybody would get wet they would cool off and be in a better mood because the one thing that always helps me get into a better mood is to cool off and one of the best ways to cool off is to get wet. So if everybody was getting wet together everybody would be cooler and then they wouldn't be in such a bad mood and everybody would get along better and we would have peace in the Middle East.....

[ertechsg]

Just a thought.. but I'm thinking the travel agency is a little slow now

[Vercingetorix]

Originally Posted by ertechsg

Just a thought.. but I'm thinking the travel agency is a little slow now

You think too much.
I thought of this while driving into work this morning.

[Zyxistal]

Because its really hard to wage a war with dive knives and spear guns.

[thesmoothdome]

If we just gave all the poor scuba divers maps, then the oppression in the middle east and south africa would end.

Sincerely,

Ms. Teen South Carolina

[FishFood]

Obviously scuba diving can bring peace because muslim people arent used to being around water, just like cats dont like being around water. Dogs, of course chase cats, which in turn run into the water. If scuba divers were to chase terrorists into the water, their fur would get all wet and they would have to bathe them selves. Obviously, they will get confused because they wont be able to lick their beards clean. They will then spend the rest of their days on earth trying to clean their beards. (imagine a dog chasing a ball attatched to his neck) With all the muslims busy licking, peace will spread, like such as, like such as.




Ok, that's my sorry attempt

[PlatypusMan]

SCUBA diving can bring peace to the Middle East, because, like, you know -- part of learning to scuba dive is sucking air through those long snorkel things? And then, learning how to hold your breath when you go down without sucking in water through those long snorkel things that look like straws, and if you're holding your breath, you can count slow to 10, like, and then, if you count slow to 10, you're like, not mad anymore? Except that, like, you know,if they're underwater, then they can't breathe, and if they can breathe, then they like, can't be fighting? So that's still a good thing, right?