Stupid Things You've Heard Divers Say

[ScubaToys Larry]

I know we have the other thread going... but that's made up kind of stuff. I got to tell you, I've heard some thing so dumb coming out of a divers mouth while sitting in Cayman... I get to wondering, what this person could possibly do for a living where you can afford all kinds of cool gear, a trip to Cayman and still be dumb as wood!

These are real...

"How deep do you have to go to dive under the island?"

"Does it rain salt water here?"

"How can the pilot find the islands with them floating around out here?"

"How many legs does an octo-pus have? 5?" (My response... uh... no.. that would be a pentapus!)

Got some real ones you've heard??

[FastPirate]

"im gonna go poke the tiger shark..."

[creggur]

These are car related, but have also left me wondering how someone could get to a place in life where they can afford a $60k car and ask these questions.

Customer calls in because she can't get her door unlocked. Here's the conversation.
Customer: "I can't get my door unlocked"
Service Consultant: "OK, do you have another key to try?"
Customer: " No, I've just got this one, I keep pushing the remote button and nothing happens"
SC: "Have you tried putting the key in the hole on the door handle?"
Customer: "Oh I didn't know you could do that"

Customer calls because she is pinned to the steering wheel by the seat.
Cust: "I just got in my car and the seat moved forward and I'm pinned against the steering wheel"
SC: "Will the seat not move back?"
Cust: "I don't know, I just sat down and the seat moved forward and pinned me to the wheel"
SC:" Can you reach the seat controls on the side of the seat?"
Cust:"Where?"
SC:"On the lower left side of the seat there are two buttons that control the seat, just move the lower one in the direction you want the seat to move"
Cust:"Oh, yeah there it goes, somebody should have showed me how to work this seat when my husband picked up the car"
- She had accidentally bumped a memory button that her 6 year old had set all the way forward and up on the seat. So she didn't know how to move the seat, but her 6 year old figured out how the memory system works....

This one we get all the time....
Car get's towed in because it quite running or won't start. First thing we check is if the car is out of gas...Sure enough it is. The worst customer we had this happen to was......

Cust.: "But the display on the dash say's I had 10 more miles until I would run out"
SC: "Sir, did it not alarm you that you were low, and put a picture of a gas pump on the display when it got below 35 miles to go"
Cust:"Well yeah, but if it's going to run out with 10 miles left you should let people know that"
SC:"Yes sir, we will from now on, we aplogize for the inconvenience. We filled it up with gas, and you can pick it up at your convenience"
Cust:" I'm not paying you for the gas, because I didn't tell you to fill it up"

sigh...

[DevilDiver]

DM- "The bottom is at 45 ft."
Diver-"Can we go deeper?"

[DevilDiver]

What are you doing on our forum! Do you think you're good enough to post here?! Huh?! DO YOU! Do you know how many dives I have!!!!!

[creggur]

Originally Posted by DevilDiver

What are you doing on our forum! Do you think you're good enough to post here?! Huh?! DO YOU! Do you know how many dives I have!!!!!

Wow, yeah, I've never seen that posted any where before, why I wouldn't have a clue where somebody might post something like that.......

[ScubaToys Larry]

[DevilDiver]

Originally Posted by creggur

Wow, yeah, I've never seen that posted any where before, why I wouldn't have a clue where somebody might post something like that.......

Yea... Who loves ya baby!!!!

[DevilDiver]

Quote:

Here's an idea... at the end of the day we will have a drawing and give away a prize only to one of the folks who is a board member.

Any board member (other than devildiver - he made fun of me in another post) will be eligible.

Sound good?


__________________

[FishFood]

Larry, I do hope you're joking...