Best "Out of Office" Automatic e-mail Replies

[DevilDiver]

Best "Out of Office" Automatic e-mail Replies


1. I am currently out at a job interview and will reply to you if I
fail to get the position. Be prepared for my mood.

2. You are receiving this automatic notification because I am out of
the office. If I was in, chances are you wouldn't have received anything
at all.

3. Sorry to have missed you, but I am at the doctor's having my brain
and heart removed so I can be promoted to our management team.

4. I will be unable to delete all the unread, worthless emails you
send me until I return from vacation. Please be patient and your
mail will be deleted in the order it was received.

5. Thank you for your email. Your credit card has been charged $5.99
for the first 10 words and $1.99 for each additional word in your
message.

6. The e-mail server is unable to verify your server connection and
is unable to deliver this message. Please restart your computer and
try sending again. (The beauty of this is that when you return, you
can see how many in-duh-viduals did this over and over.)

7. Thank you for your message, which has been added to a queuing
system. You are currently in 352nd place, and can expect to receive
a reply in approximately 19 weeks.

8. Hi, I'm thinking about what you've just sent me. Please wait by
your PC for my response.

9. I've run away to join a different circus.

10. I will be out of the office for the next 2 weeks for medical
reasons. When I return, please refer to me as 'Loretta' instead of
'Steve'.