Advice to men considering entering a relationship

[robjoubert]

This is meant as a translation so that your new life will be a little smother:

Womans Dictionary
Yes = No
No = Yes
Maybe = No
I’m sorry = You’ll be sorry
We need = I want
It’s your decision = My correct decision should be obvious by now
Do what you want = You’ll pay for this later
We need to talk = I need to complain
Sure go ahead = I don’t want you to
I’m not upset = Of course I’m upset, you moron
This kitchen is so inconvenient = I want a new house
I want new curtains = carpeting, furniture, and wallpaper
I heard a noise = I noticed you were almost asleep
Do you love me? = I’m going to ask for something expensive
How much do you love me? = I did something today you’re going to hate
I’ll be ready in a minute = Kick off your shoes and find a good game on TV
You have to learn to communicate = Just agree with me
Are you listening to me!? = Too late, you’re dead

[navyhmc]

One correction:

Yes = No
No = NO!!!!!!
Maybe = No, why are you asking?

[DMWiz]

I thought I had the whole women's speak thing figured out after 10+ years of being married, but now I realize that when you think you know what she's saying she's bound to change it just to keep you guessing!

[ndv21]

If women would have been in charge of German communications during WW2, the alies would have lost the war. The enigma machine was no match for estrogenous communication!

[hychang]

Originally Posted by ndv21

If women would have been in charge of German communications during WW2, the alies would have lost the war. The enigma machine was no match for estrogenous communication!

!!!

[JCAT]

After 25 years of marriage, my advice is simply....

RUN!

[mike_s]

well you know that they say marriage is a great institution, if you want to be institutionalized....

[northfrisian]

Guys, it's not all that complicated. After 17 years of marriage I learned whenever you happen to get into an argument with her make sure you have the last words. "Yes, ma'am, you are absolutely right, I will never ever do that again."

[navyhmc]

After 22 years, I've learned that you just can't win. so don't try...

Right honey???

[cruzan]

Originally Posted by robjoubert

This is meant as a translation so that your new life will be a little smother:

Womans Dictionary
Yes = No
No = Yes
Maybe = No
I’m sorry = You’ll be sorry
We need = I want
It’s your decision = My correct decision should be obvious by now
Do what you want = You’ll pay for this later
We need to talk = I need to complain
Sure go ahead = I don’t want you to
I’m not upset = Of course I’m upset, you moron
This kitchen is so inconvenient = I want a new house
I want new curtains = carpeting, furniture, and wallpaper
I heard a noise = I noticed you were almost asleep
Do you love me? = I’m going to ask for something expensive
How much do you love me? = I did something today you’re going to hate
I’ll be ready in a minute = Kick off your shoes and find a good game on TV
You have to learn to communicate = Just agree with me
Are you listening to me!? = Too late, you’re dead

Just remember one thing, we all have a psychic connection with each other too.