Application for hurt feelings

[GFD113]

New compliant form at work.




Date______________

Time feelings hurt______________A.M / P.M.

1. Wich ear were words of hurtfullness spoken into?
Left___ Right___ Both___

2. Permanent Damage?
Yes___ No___

3. Do you need a tissue?
Yes___ No___

4.Reason for filing this report (Check all that apply)
a. Thin Skinned ____
b. I am a Wenie ____
c. I have woman like hormones ____
d. Cry Baby ____
e. I need a sex change ____
f. Dad never loved me enough ____
g. All ov the above ____

5. Name of person who hurt feelings _____________________________

6. If you need a hug or a bag of cotton to dab between your legs to stop the bleeding, contact your local HR lady and let her hug you and tell you everything will be ok. You are a victim, further consultation can be reached by calling 1-800-cry-baby. or 1-800-lil-girl.

Name___________________________

Signature________________________

[snagel]

I work in HR and this is great! Somehow, I'm sure I couldn't use it without getting in some big trouble. But, how true it is.

Snagel

[Vercingetorix]

Amen. I ran into this when another employee (male) felt I didn't like him. So, I had to apologize to him, his supervisor, his Director, and his V.P. I was even put on PIP (Performance Improvement Program). Nobody else complained about me. In fact, I was often requested to be the team leader or project that were in trouble.

This moron was on my project team; I'm an IT Project Manager. Had I abused him? No. Called him names? Embarassed him in front of the team? No.

I think a nice axe handle between his eyes would have cured his problem.

[emt]

Vercingetorix...Years ago, I used to think everyone wanted to work hard & make the company the best and military type rules etc. were fine if followed. I thought all the workers on the team had the primary goal of productivity and pleasing the customers.
I was wrong, wrong, wrong.

New primary goal = pleasing associates to prevent HR type questions and frustrating explanations. All the other goals are of less importance. Followed for past 15 years and I sleep much easier now. I prefer working 2 hours extra at work with no additional pay vs. 1 hour thinking of junk like this at night in bed anytime.

[Desert_Diver]

Originally Posted by emt

Vercingetorix...Years ago, I used to think everyone wanted to work hard & make the company the best and military type rules etc. were fine if followed. I thought all the workers on the team had the primary goal of productivity and pleasing the customers.
I was wrong, wrong, wrong.

New primary goal = pleasing associates to prevent HR type questions and frustrating explanations. All the other goals are of less importance. Followed for past 15 years and I sleep much easier now. I prefer working 2 hours extra at work with no additional pay vs. 1 hour thinking of junk like this at night in bed anytime.

Things may be changing. I have heard (rumor only- no first hand experience) that in Air Force basic training, every trainee is issued a "stress" card. If you hold it up, the drill instructor has to give you a time out to repair you make up.

Art

[scubagirlj]

recently got written up for using "profane & unprofessional" language towards a fellow employee(male & i'm not)-it sure wasn't anything that he hadn't heard or said before, and it was a well deserved and long overdue assessment-he must have used one of your forms!

[emt]

Well, this little thread probably will save me some sleep.

I must remember my: New primary goal = pleasing associates to prevent HR type questions and frustrating explanations. All the other goals are of less importance.

I was getting ready to blast a review on a deserving individual. I will now tone it down significantly and almost disregard the intentional deviations from my directions. I will try to forget this individual failing to perform duties in the job description and instead telling me that "I don't do inventories - you do" (everyone does inventories I'm just more responsible for outcome) and on another occasion telling me I had to phone an associate, the day before returning from vacation, and change their schedule to accommodate her (I refused telling her to do it if wanted as I will not call on such short notice & on vacation)

[navyhmc]

Originally Posted by Desert_Diver

Things may be changing. I have heard (rumor only- no first hand experience) that in Air Force basic training, every trainee is issued a "stress" card. If you hold it up, the drill instructor has to give you a time out to repair you make up.

Art

I can't speak for the USAF, but the navy actually had that in the late 80's and it stopped in 1990. The cards were supposed to be a boot camp item only.

Actually had a young HA (Hospitalman Apprentice- E-2 type) that gave me one of those while in Desert Storm. We were given advanced warning that we would have casualties coming to our facility-eta 60 minutes. Enough time to get everything restocked, folks fed and watered and everything ready to go. As we're moving to get things ready, this little pogue say he needs a time out as he is getting stressed. Long story short, the card was torn up, he was chewed out and then after the crisis was over, was moved to a far less stressful area of the facility: The mental hold area. The Chaplain agreed with me when he went to him to complain about the mean and ugly LPO (okay, the chaplain agreed with him on the mean and ugly part. )

[inventor]

I've worked in various shops (air conditioning, building maintenance, plumbing, etc..) and the sheer verbal brutality is about equal to low yeild nuclear weaponry. I've seen punches thrown and many beers bought. Most of these guys would break your b***s walking in the door and help you reroof your house in August. Anybody that couldn't dish it out, much less take it, wouldn't last a day. You can talk crap to your guys all day long, but Lord help anybody else that does.

In short, if you survived kindergarten, you should be able to handle this s***. As for the people you had to appologize to.. beaten with sticks.

I'm just sayin'...

[Crimediver]

I just finished a 3 day school taught for state supervisory personnel last week. It was designed to show us proper ways to communicate with employees and to do evaluations, etc. They used a lot of buzz words like empowerment and ownership. They gave us handy tips on the proper ways of dealing with crybabies like using Kleenex when doing evaluations and not to offer toilet paper or paper towels to a crying employee. This shows the employee you are considerate. I kid you not.

Then the topic came up on what to do if an employee just walked out of the office during an evaluation. We were told not to stop them as they may get violent. Maybe there are a lot off thin skinned people in the workplace but a crybaby would last about 5 minutes before we got rid of them where I work.

This class was taught by several older women who were very nice but very politically correct.

I am a police supervisor. If anyone started crying during an evaluation it would only be because I shot them with pepper spray. And everyone in the room is carrying a .40 caliber Glock.

Actually no one is going to start anything with anybody where I work. An armed society is a polite society. And all the crybabies got thrown out during the police academy training. No time outs with my outfit.